


Issues

by dreamless6



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Age Difference, Character Death, Conflicted Dean, Daddy Issues, Depression, F/M, Happy Sam, Platonic Destiel, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-15
Updated: 2018-01-15
Packaged: 2018-12-02 11:23:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 24,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11508393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamless6/pseuds/dreamless6
Summary: "Where do we cross the line? "Claire runs into Winchesters, not expecting to end up living with them, and liking it a little to much. Dean can say the same.





	1. Chapter 1

’’Claire, you’re not ready for serious hunting yet,’’ Dean said stuffing his mouth with cake.

They were in a diner, kinda celebrating Claire’s 21st birthday. they were in a small booth, Claire on the one side and Sam and Dean on the other. They ordered a big cake witch Dean devoured almost all by himself.

’’Oh, wow, what’s that supposed to mean?’’ she asked.

’’You know he didn’t mean it that way,’’ Sam jumped in trying to be the peacemaker like always.

’’Yeah I did. You’re just a kid, Claire. You know what happened the last time you were hunting with us,’’ Dean said reminding her of that awful night when everyone thought they lost her. Yet, she couldn’t give up on hunting. It had became her life and a part of her that she couldn’t just trow away, or forget. Why fight it when you can embrace it?

’’How old were you when you first started hunting?’’ she went on full defense mode.

’’That’s different and you know it. We were forced in this life since before I knew how to write.’’

’’Well. this is my choice and if I don’t hunt with you guys, I’ll hunt on my own.’’

They both looked at her like she was just a kid trying to prove her point, and not working.

Sam smiled, ’’Good, you’ll probably find small cases, because trouble always follows us two. I think you’re better without us.’’

’’Fine, I already have a gig. I have a feeling it’s witch business.’’

’’What? Claire, you can’t handle witches by yourself. They will eat you for breakfast,’ ’Dean said standing up for the table.

’’Dude, don’t make a scene,’’ Sam said looking around the dinner. It was almost empty, except for a couple making out and some guy trying to hit on the waitress.

Dean sat down giving Sam the rest of his cake.

’’You’re not finishing your cake?’’ he looked so surprised that Claire had to hide a smile. ’’I lost my appetite imagining the barbecuing Claire.’’ And that was it. She broke into laughter, making that couple turn their hears and looking at her.

Sam started laughing with her, making so much noise at 3am. Dean stared at her, smiling and taking his cake back.

’’Fuck both of you. I’m just worried’’,he said with full mouth of cake.

Claire wiped her tears from laughing and removed her jacket. At the same moment Dean started coughing and the waitress came to the table.

’’Are you fine?’’ she asked.

Dean composed himself and smiled, ’’Yeah. And so are you,’’ he kind of winked.

Claire rolled her eyes thinking that it was so cliche and just gross, but the waitress started giggling and touched Dean’s shoulder. Sam was looking at his phone and not at that weird scene in front of her. Maybe he got used to that, Claire thought. To her, Dean always seemed goofy and fatherly, she forgot that he has this other side, he was a man after all, and she could see why women turn into giggly idiots in front of him. He never showed that side in front of her. Why would he? She was just a kid to him, and he was 40 for god’s sake. Why was she even thinking of that? She composed herself and listened their conversation.

’’I know, right? Well, my shift ends in fifteen,’’ she said repeatedly touching her hair.

’’I’ll be right here,’’ he winked, and she almost lost her breath.

Claire snorted. the waitress somehow turned around and left behind the counter. Dean looked at Claire still smiling from that exchange. Sam was still looking in his phone. Claire could swear he was like a teenager some times.

’’What?’’ he asked biting his lip.

’’Nothin’,’’ she replied smirking.

’’Bet you didn’t know I had it in me.’’

’’You’re full of surprises, old man. But what would happen if you came across a normal smart ass woman, not a busty dumb blonde?’’ she smiled.

’’You’re blonde.’’

’’Not relevant to this conversation,’’ she almost blushed.

’’Well, then, I would buy her dinner, talk about politics or weather and the I would sleep with her,’’ he smiled proudly.

’’Wow, you’re such a pig.’’

’’What do you want me to say Claire? That I would talk about my family, my job, she would fall for me and we would live happily ever after? That’s not a hunter’s life. We can’t be with other people. They would either run from us thinking we’re nuts, or they will somehow accept us and we would bring trouble to them and hurt them. I tried living like that once, I was nice while it lasted, but I learned my lesson. Not ever again. Hunters are lonely, that’s a fact. Well, unless they find a fellow hunter to spend their lives with. I’ve seen it, but it’s really rare,’’ he moved across the table and whispered to Claire. ’’Who do you think he’s texting the whole time?’’ they looked at Sam, smiling at the phone, ’’Eileen. She’s a hunter, a very good one. He deserves this, more than I do.’’

’’So you collect girls from every town you’re in at the moment because you think you don’t deserve happiness,’’ she looked at him disapprovingly.

’’Hey, I’m not counting. That would be a douche move,’’ Dean smiled.

’’You do deserve happiness.’’

’’That doesn’t come naturally to me. And I ain’t got time for that. Looking for hunters to fall in love with while hunting? Sounds like a fairy tale for kids,’’ he smiled sadly.

It may sounded like a fairy tale, but Claire could see that he wouldn’t mind that happening to him at all.

’’Let me come with you and I will find you a soulmate,’’ she said, determined.

He laughed standing up, ’’Didn’t know you care so much, kiddo.’’  
’’Sam, please,’’she begged with puppy eyes.

Sam put his phone in his pocket. And threw some cash on the table. ’’We’ll see.’’

Claire literally squeaked. She never made that sound in her whole life.

’’Was that girly noise? Are you actually a girl?“ Dean teased.

’’Shut up, I’m excited.’’ she stood up too, and put her jacket on.

’’I said that we’ll see. And only if you don’t get killed on this vampire hunt. Then we’ll talk about these witches.’’

’’I will kill this motherfuckers, you’ll see. You’ll both see.’’

’’Language. And let’s not get ahead of ourselves. First, go sleep , and tomorrow we will talk about this vampire clan. But now, I’m about to get lucky,’’ Dean smiled triumphantly.

’’Gross,’’ Sam and Claire said in union

Dean went trough the back door, that waitress probably waiting for him there. Claire and Sam went to the Impala, parked in front of the diner. Sam’s phone started ringing and his face immediately lit up.

’’I’ll wait in the car,’’ she smiled.

She opened the door right before she heard someone running behind her. She immediately turned into hunter-mode and pulled up a knife from her jacked. She turned around and saw a figure running a couple of meters in front of her. She decided to try to throw the knife instead of stabbing him because that would mean a close encounter and the figure looked a lot bigger than her. She threw the knife, but the man ducked and missed it.

’’What the hell?’’ she could her him yelling.

He came out of the shadow wearing that frown that he made every time she did something stupid. Dean.

’’I can say the same thing to you! I could’ve killed you!’’

He came closer, standing in front of her. His lips were red and swollen.

’’No, you couldn’t. I have good reflexes,’’ he smirked. ’’Also, sloppy throw.’’

’’Thanks, old man. I’ll keep that in mind the next time I try to kill you.’’

He laughed and bend closing the little distance between them kissing her on the cheek, ’’Happy birthday, Claire.’’

She blushed, but was relieved that it was too dark for him to see. He smelled really good.

’’No ’kiddo’?’’she asked.

’’Not anymore,’’ he smiled fondly. ’’You’re even old enough to buy yourself a drink now.’’

’’But not old enough to hunt?’’

’’Claire, don’t start. You heard Sam, we’ll talk about it.’’

She decided to let it go for that night. She gathered up the courage, stood up on her tip toes and kissed him on the cheek, copying him. She could feel him smiling against her. They stood like that for a few moments and then she took a couple of steps away from him.

’’Thanks for the cake. Even though you mostly ate it by yourself,’’ she laughed, breaking the tension.

’’Looks good on me,though, right?’’ he pointed at his upper body, taking the jacket off, making a show of himself. ’’You should see the abs. Too bad I have so many layers on.’’, he joked.

’’No thanks,’’ she was amazed how could he still have that boyish charm and enthusiasm even in his age. Which was not even that old, Claire thought.

’’Well, that’s the first.’’

They heard Sam getting into the car and calling for Claire.

’’Have a good time, grandpa’ she teased.

’’Hey, if you’re not a kid anymore, then it’s only fair that cut it with the old man jokes.’’

’’Not gonna happen,’’ Claire laughed leaning to wipe the lipstick from his lips not even realizing what she did.

When he looked at her like she’s some crazed animal, she truly wanted to slap herself. Dean recovered from the shock and just smiled turning away, probably having his usual saturday night, while Claire wanted to punch somebody.

Sam drove them to the hotel they were staying. Those two took one room, which Claire thought was funny. Two grown men still sharing a hotel everywhere they go. That was some serious trust. She was in her room, next to theirs. She called Jody to tell her that she was alive and okay like every night, undressed and got under the covers. It was early but still, she was so exhausted.

Life with hunters was tiring, even when all they did was eat cake, celebrate birthdays and touch each others lips


	2. Chapter 2

The next day, Sam found a few abandoned buildings, and they started driving from one to another  
looking for that god damned vampire.Claire was pissed. With driving for hours and Dean’s stories about last night all she wanted to do was stab or behead something. How could Sam not get sick of his detailed descriptions and even sounds coming from his mouth imitating the waitress? Claire thought that he probably had an off switch and blocked out all of Dean’s bullshit. She coughed, trying to end his monologue.

Dean was on the passenger seat, considering that he was hella hungover. He turned around facing Claire. „Oh, sorry about that. Shouldn't have made it so graphic considering you’re here. Don’t tell Jody.’’

  
’’The R-rated stuff doesn’t bother me, Dean,’’ she rolled her eyes. He still saw her as a kid.

  
’’Then wh-’’ the car stopped and the three of them looked in from of them. There was an old gas station. It looked abandoned.

  
’’Last stop. Our guys are here. Gear up,’’ Sam and Dean opened the doors at the same time and went behind the car to get weapons. Claire got out of the car trying to keep up with them.

  
’’What am I gonna get?’’ she asked Sam, trying to look as badass as she could.

  
Sam looked for a few seconds and found a decent looking machete. Claire smiled, excited that someone is finally seeing her as she truly is, a hunter. But then Dean happened.

  
He snatched the machete from Sam’s hand. ’’What the hell dude? She isn’t coming!’’

  
’’Why not? She is competent of killing a few vampires, who knows what she killed when she was alone, Dean. Alone. We were almost never alone, and even had difficulties on a hunt. More that I can count, actually. Give her a break,’’ Sam was almost out of his breath.

  
’’Didn’t know you cared so much,’’ Claire teased Sam, punching him.

  
’’Shut up,’’ he laughed.

  
Dean stood there annoyed waiting for their game to end, ’’And I am childish ?’’ he sounded annoyed.

  
’’C’mon Dean, we can’t protect her forever. I am in for her joining us. We need more laughter in  
that bunker,’’ Sam said.

  
’’Oh, now she is coming to the bunker? Well, isn’t that just fucking peachy!’’

  
’’What’s bothering you so much, Dean?’’ Sam asked giving the machete to Claire and closing the trunk.

  
Dean grunted, looking like he was having a mental debate with himself. They both looked at him expectantly. Sam, with his famous puppy eyes and Claire just wondering why he didn’t want to have her around so bad. She wasn’t such a bad company, was she?

  
’’Fine,’’ they almost started yelling, right there, in front of a vampire dent. ’’But, only if you prove yourself a team player and don’t fuck this up.’’

  
She jumped and hugged him, practically squeezing the life out of him. ’’I’ll kill these sons of bitches.’’

  
Dean and Sam got their weapons and they headed inside. Right before they went trough the door, Dean grabbed Claire’s hand and made her turn to face him.  
’’And one more thing. Please don’t get yourself killed, Claire.’’

  
She clenched his hand, smiling. She always thought that the only reason he cared for her wasCastiel, but she could see that he started seeing her as her own person, and not just somebody’s responsibility.

  
’’Let’s kill some vampires,’’ she winked.

  
Sam tried to pick the lock, but since it took too long, Dean knocked the door and busted thoughthem holding a gun in one hand and the machete in the other. There were a lot more vampires than Claire expected. She thought there were a couple of them, but there were more than half a dozen. She smiled wickedly. She was going to prove herself to them and it was going to be fucking epic. Vampires started running in all directions, Sam following three of them upstairs, while Claire and Dean stayed with the rest that wanted to fight. One started running towards Dean, but he ducked and in a swift move turned and cut his head off. Three left, not counting the runners. Claire couldn’t wait, she threw herself at the nearest one and started waving her machete trying to hit the target, but the vampire was too quick. He kicked her in the stomach and she fell down trying to breathe properly. He started making his way to her neck, but fortunately her adrenaline kicked in and she rolled to where her machete was and beheaded him, making her whole face covered in his blood. She looked over at Dean who was fighting off an old woman who was surprisingly quick. Okay, she was not that old, she just wanted for Dean to suck just a little. He was a damn God on the battlefield.  
Suddenly, she felt pain in the shoulder, which started growing until it numbed her body. She turned and saw a guy holding a big piece of wood, and a half of it was still inside her. She got fucking sidetracked watching Dean. Angry at herself, she kicked the vampire making him hit the wall and dropping the piece of wood. She put the machete under his chin, smiling.

  
’’Gotcha baby,’’ she cut his head off in one quick move, Claire wiped her face and turned in time to see Sam coming down the stairs and Dean wiping his  
blade on the corpse.

  
’’You okay guys?“ Sam asked looking around the room

  
’’Yup,’’ Claire answered, proud of herself, looking for some sort of confirmation.

  
When Sam nodded, she smiled, her confidence boosted. ’’I’m not so sure for Dean, He barely fought off a grandma.’’

  
’’Kiddo, your perception of age is truly amazing,’’ Dean smiled.

  
He actually smiled for the first time that day, and she was the reason. She was weirdly very proud of herself.

  
’’Not kiddo. We scored the same.’’ she showed around the room.

  
He looked around and frowned like he was remembering something bad. She always thought that he liked killing creatures. Maybe he did, but it wasn’t always a pleasant feeling. After all the years of killing, who knows how Dean felt when he confronted bad guys. He snapped out of it and stood in front of Claire, wiping the blood from her cheek. She closed her eyes and smiled, feeling like she was floating. The next moment she was falling with incredible pain and felt strong arms wrapping around her while she fell into unconsciousness.


	3. Chapter 3

“Dean, calm down, she’s going to be okay. We know that she’s a fighter,” Claire heard voices but couldn’t open her eyes or figure out where she was.

She felt something soft underneath her and pain in her back. Why in hell did it hurt so much?

“It’s been two days, man. I-I can’t..”

She heard footsteps leaving the room and the other person standing up, pacing the room. Claire tried to move or open her eyes but she was completely paralyzed. She remembered lots of vampires,beheading a couple of them, and watching Dean fight. And the pain. That fucking wood! A vampire stabbed her! No wonder she couldn’t move, she was surprised she was even alive. But she wasn’t scared, which was kinda weird.

She could hear a cellphone ringing, “Hey Jody. Coming soon?” 

It was Sam, she could recognize the voices now. So Dean probably left. He really didn’t give a crap about her, when he couldn’t even stay with her while she was like this. And Jody. Jody is coming, and probably Alex. She is never going to let her join Sam and Dean after she sees her like this. She figured she looked like crap, and probably lying in some hospital bed.

“Great. No, no changes. Dean is going crazy,” Sam said.

She could her screaming of some sort and figured that Jody is pissed like always. Claire wanted to smile at that. She missed her.  
“I know, I know. It was all on me, we barely convinced Dean. But Jody, from what he’s told me, she was lethal. He said that she killed two of them twice the size of her. If Dean was impressed, you should reconsider your next move.”

Dean said something nice? And Sam is convincing Jody? She felt kinda overwhelmed, because she never had someone to take care of her like they did. She always saw Sam as her brother, and she loved him like he was family. With him it was easy, because she knew what he was thinking and feeling, he wasn’t closed off like Dean. She couldn’t bond with him in that way. After the werewolf incident she knew he cared for her, but she didn’t wanted to be like a sister to him. She just wanted for him to care a little more. She knew she was fucked up, but she just couldn’t help it.

“Okay. See you then.”

She heard him leaving the room, leaving her alone. After a while she drifted to sleep.

She could hear a silent voice telling her it was going to be okay, that she was strong. She felt like smiling, and wanted to hug the person, just for believing in her. Then there was nothing.

“Sir, I’m going to need you to leave the room,” a voice woke her up.

“But she moved!” she could her Dean yelling.

She opened her eyes after a few tries, but everyone were blurry. There was a doctor beside her bed and a few nurses trying to move Dean out of the room. Which was unfortunate for them. He would only move if he wanted to. 

“That’s exactly why I need to you to go. I need to do a couple of check ups on her. Please.”

“It’s okay, old man, I’ll see you later,” she finally found her voice and managed a sentence. She was happy he cared.

Claire saw him starting to smile, and that made her smile. Instead, she started coughing and the doctor himself helped the nurses getting Dean out of the room.

“I’ll break your face man, don’t you fucking touch me,” she could her the voices from the hall, and hoped Dean wouldn’t hurt them. Where’s Sam when you need him the most?

In the next moment doctor was by her side helping her sit up.

“Where did you find this guy?” Doctor joked fixing her pillow, “I don’t see the ring, so I guess, boyfriend?”

Claire coughed again, longer this time, “Some would say he’s my father,” she basically croaked.

The doctor laughed, “Well, a friend of mine has married a girl 15 years younger, which was also his sister’s friend. So this is nothing.”

She coughed a few times just to regain her voice. She looked this doctor better and smiled. He was hot. Like, stupid hot, Claire thought. And he was talking freely with her which was awesome.

“Wow, that’s messy,” she laughed. “But he is a friend of mine, nothing more.”

“Well, that’s unfortunate,” he said, but it didn’t sound like he was sad.

Claire hasn’t been with a guy for a few months, actually, make that a year, but she could pick up a hint or two.

“And why is that?” she smiled, trying to flirt like a dumbass in her hospital gown with a face full of injuries while he was doing all sorts of tests.

“I just think that he’s missing out,” he said looking at her.

She felt really insecure all of the sudden. He was gorgeous. Blond hair, green eyes, ripped and so tall. 

“I’m Claire,” she shook his hand not loosing the smirk.

“Jamie. Very nice to meet you, Claire.”

“Not to be rude, but since we were recently visiting this topic, how old are you?” 

”I don’t think you’ll like my answer Claire,” he laughed. “I mean, since you called that guy ‘old man’.”

“That’s just how we joke. I don’t actually think he’s old. I mean, have you seen him?” 

She did not just said that. She looked around to see if someone was listening. Dean would end her if he heard it. Lucky for her, there was no one around.

“Well okay then. I’m 30,” he said observing her reaction.

She was actually relieved. He was scared, and it was cute. 

“I guess you’re mid twenties?” Jamie said breaking her out of her thoughts.

“Well, recently turned twenty one,” she laughed. She never had a problem with ages until now. Did she have a kink? Well no, every boyfriend of hers was her age. Maybe just Dean was her kink.

“How about I let you rest for a while and when you’re all better I’ll ask you out. Sounds like a plan?” He smirked.

She nodded and he left with a pile of papers. She hasn’t even noticed that he was done with the tests. And now she was bored. She couldn’t sleep so she tried to stand up to find her phone or just to feel her legs. It hurt like hell. She wasn’t thinking about the injury until now, but what if it doesn’t heal properly? What if she can’t hunt? That would be the end of her. She tried to walk to the door even though she basically screamed with every move, but she needed to show herself that she’s strong, she needed to believe in that voice inside her head.

“Can I come in now, you dumbass?”, Dean was yelling in front of the door.

Her legs gave out and she tried to catch the door handle before she collapse to the floor but the door suddenly opened revealing angry Dean holding two cups of coffee in hands. She tried to reach the door but the only thing she could reach was Dean, and in the next second the two coffees were on them, and she was clutching Dean for her dear life. He tried to wrap her with his arms but instead he picked her up bridal style and took her to bed. 

“Fuck,you are strong,” she said under her breath.

“What?” He asked lowering her onto bed. She was wet and so was he, except that he was wearing a white shirt and Claire had never seen a hotter thing in her life. She legitimately couldn’t believe what she was thinking. About fucking Dean Winchester.

“Nothing,” get a grip.

“You’re wet.”  
Oh you have no idea. 

“So are you.”

“And whose fault is that? Why were you even out of the bed Claire? You just fucking woke up?” he actually started yelling. Why was he always pissed at her?

“I was bored, okay?” she answered yelling.

He started pacing through the room probably trying too keep his cool. “You-you’re such a child sometimes! Why would you just get out of bed in which you were in a fucking coma for two days just because you got bored? “

She knew it was stupid, but to dean to call her a child, that pissed her of the most. “I am a child? I do one stupid thing and all of the sudden I am a child? Yeah, I may be younger, but you should see yourself Dean. All you do is fuck, describe it, eat, tell your jokes that aren’t even funny and yell at me. So think again.”

She was literally in his face and out of her breath. Even though she was mad at him, she still felt something when he was around her. And having him this close wasn’t good for her. She could do something stupid and he would never look at her again. And there goes her not hunting alone plan. It wasn’t actually a plan, she just loved the boys’ company. 

She backed away, trying to calm her breathing. Dean looked like he wanted to strangle her, and she couldn’t blame him. He crossed the line, and the rest was on him.

There was a knock on the door. They both turned and Claire squeaked a ‘come in’.

Jody, Alex and Sam walked in with food in their hands. Good, she was starving. They stood still for a while and Claire was scared for a second that they saw how close was she to Dean. She couldn’t explain it to herself, not to mention Dean or the others. Fortunately, they were fixated on something else.

“Why are your clothes wet?” Sam asked, with Alex and Jody next to him nodding.

She was so relieved that she started laughing like a crazy woman, and somehow Dean had joined. Guess he couldn’t stay mad for long.

“I kinda fell onto Dean while he was holding a cup of coffee”

“Two cups,” Dean added.

Claire looked at him. “You actually brought me a coffee.”

He just smiled and turned his focus on the visitors.

Jody looked beyond confused. “From the top, I have all the time in the world.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you are enjoying this. It's kinda glitchy, because I'm a Slavic girl, and English is not my 1st language.  
> Next chapter is in Dean's POV,be out soon


	4. Chapter 4

Claire was trying to explain everything to Jody without revealing too much of the details which would made her lock Claire up. It was funny to Dean, but it seemed like Clare was actually kinda scared of her reaction. The three of them had become a family, and Dean was proud of himself for helping make that happen. 

They brought a few extra chairs and all of them settled in in Claire’s hospital room. He was just worried that they’ll all exhaust her, she was fragile as it is, and now Jody’s yelling and lecturing, it didn’t go well with her health.

He cared for that girl, and he would help her in any way he could. “Okay, let’s all calm down and look this situation in a positive light. She ganked two adult vampires, and that counts as something, right?”

Claire looked at him incredulously, like she couldn’t believe that he was praising her. Yeah, he didn’t always said it out loud but he was proud of Claire, most of the time. He felt like if he always told her what he thought, she would get attached or some shit, like she did with Sam, and he didn’t need that in his life. He knew what happens to people who learn to care for him. He’s attended all of their funerals.

“And she got nearly killed in he process!” Jody practically screamed at him.

“But I am still here, aren’t I?” Claire responded.

“Pure luck, Claire!”

Dean looked at Claire trying to read how does she want to proceed with this. He would back her up, no matter what. She bit her lip, and Dean felt himself shifting in his chair. When he found a comfortable position he cleared his throat and tried to fix the situation. “She’s a novice. These things happen.”

He sounded stone cold, but when she collapsed in his arms, his heart kinda stopped for a second. In that moment he realized that this girl couldn’t hunt alone anymore and if she makes out, he will always be by her side to protect her, not just for Castiel, but for himself too.

“Yeah, and I don’t know is she told you guys, but Claire asked us to move in, and we think it would be the best solution for her hunting alone. She would have protection twenty four seven, a place to sleep and eat and she could learn a lot in the bunker.” Sam jumped in, even though they didn’t exactly came to an arrangement, but Dean didn’t mind. He wouldn’t leave the kid alone for a second after what happened.

“Jody, just hear them out. You trust them, so why don’t you trust me to make a good decision?” Claire said trying to get up.

“You can’t just- you-” Jody looked like she was going to explode. She got out of the room, probably trying not to lose her temper. Sam followed her immediately after. Dean would too, but he was not good with the talking-bout-feelings stuff. 

Alex sat beside Claire, looking exhausted and sad. That girl had enough problems for her age. And now her ‘sister’ got attacked by vampires. He couldn’t even imagine what was on her mind.

“Please Alex, just talk to her. She listens to you. Tell her that they’ll keep me safe. It’s better than hunting alone ,right?” Claire looked like she was in pain, and Dean’s immediate reaction was to make Alex leave the room so she could sleep and rest, but he could see that she needed to talk to her. Who know how long they haven’t seen each other.

“I trust you know what you’re doing. And I know I say this a lot, but just consider a normal life. College, boys, family. It’s not too difficult to have.” Alex was so hopeful, but Dean knew Claire. He knew that hunting was in her blood. She started by looking for her mother, just like Dean and Sam for John, and she couldn’t give it up so easily.

“It is to me. This is my life, Alex, you know it. And it may sound crazy, but I like it. I feel like its my calling.” Claire laughed. “Nursing school is not for everyone.”

Alex smiled and it seemed like they were on the same page. He was happy that she has someone even if was fraction of what he has with Sam.   
Later, Dean and Sam offered to stay in hospital with Claire, but Claire convinced everyone that she was good on her own. All of them found a hotel by the hospital, Jody and Alex in one room, he and Sam in the other. 

“I’m worried about her, man. She’s all alone there and what if something goes wrong?”, Dean sat on the chair not looking away from his phone.

“What could happen? It’s a really great hospital, and we’re like three buildings away. Stop being a bitch,” Sam smiled and flopped on the bed.  
“Hey! No one calls me a bitch, bitch.”

“Then stop looking at the stupid phone and get some sleep.”  
Dean was hesitant. What if she calles? He told Claire to call him if anything was wrong. What if he misses the call? “Shut up.”  
He lay on the bed and stared at the ceiling. He wondered at what point has this became his life? Worrying about twenty year old girls. Okay, twenty one, but whats the difference when she was acting like a five year old. Yeah, she certainly didn’t look like a kid. Dean noticed the new shoulder length haircut, and a little more makeup, and those shirts that didn’t go with her body. Did she intentionally bought a three size bigger shirts? 

He heard Sam exiting the bathroom and laying in bed. “Night.”

“Night,” he answered snapping himself from thinking about Claire. He felt like a perv. He was almost twenty years older than the girl. It was legal and everything, but it was Claire, Jimmy’s daughter, Cass’ responsibility. He was going to lose it when she comes to the bunker with them. If she comes, Dean thought. She needed to come. Dean didn’t know why, but he knew that she’d became someone he could really care about, even if that was a bad thing. 

To hell with it.  
Dean checked too see if Sam was sleeping, got his jacket and hurried out of the hotel. He was worried about her. And it didn’t felt right for her to sleep alone, even if she did exactly that for the past year. 

He basically ran to the hospital at 2 am. He managed to sneak past the nurses and got to the second floor, where she was staying.  
He knocked on the door, waiting for an answer.

“Yeah?” she wasn’t asleep. Good.

Dean opened the door and smiled like an idiot that he was. “Whatcha doin’ awake, kiddo?”

She gave him the bitch face. He laughed.

“Sorry, no more kiddo,” he grinned. “But really, shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

“Shouldn’t you be sleeping? In your hotel room?”, she smirked and pulled herself into sitting position. She wasn’t wearing a hospital gown anymore, instead she had a white, almost see-though t shirt, that made Dean pretty uncomfortable.

She sure was not kid anymore, that’s for sure. He sat on a chair next to her, slapping himself mentally for being a fucking moron.  
“Um, yeah. I got bored, wanted to see how was my new protegee.”

She smiled, “Does that mean I’m qualified enough to play with the big boys?”

“If it’s up to us, yeah. You just have to convince Jody.”

“Just,” she snorted, making Dean laugh.

“What was that?”

“Shut up,” she punched him in the arm, but it seemed like she got up too fast, and he could see that she was in pain, even though she tried to cover it.

“You don’t have to pretend around me,” he said standing up and making his way toward her bed. “Pain doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.”

He sat beside her, and put a hand on her cheek in a moment of sentimentality. He didn’t even thought about it, he just bent and kissed her forehead, and it felt nice. Really nice. 

“What’s happening?”she asked him opening her eyes as while his face was still over hers. He felt her shiver. 

He had no idea. He was seeing her in a new light, so vulnerable, fragile, lying underneath him like that. 

“I don’t know,” he whispered, his mouth a breath away from hers.

He felt her angling her face and bringing their lips closer, and he got scared. Dean Winchester got scared. He couldn’t explain what the hell was he thinking coming here and almost kissing a girl half his age. It wasn’t right.

He pulled away like she burnt him. Claire looked like he felt. Confused. He felt like he was using the girl. Even though he cared for her, this was too risky. 

“I’m sorry,” he heard her whisper. Claire Novak apologized to him. And she didn’t even do anything wrong.

“What for?” he asked her stepping away from her bed. He needed as much space as possible.

“For ruining this.”

What was she talking about? Dean felt like she was talking in some ancient language, and he could never understand her. Actually, he always felt like that, but this was different. 

“You didn’t ruin anything, Claire,” he shook his head. “Nothing happened, and if it did, it would be my mistake, and there’s no need to talk again about it, right?”

In that moment, he wasn’t even worried about Cass or Sam. The only thing he was worried was how that affected Claire. Would she hate him, or would she go with it? He felt wrong even thinking about that. There wasn’t anything to go with, it was just the heat of the moment. Nothing more.

“Right,” she smiled.

He was sad. About the whole situation, and how it will affect them in the future. He was shoot-first-ask-question-later guy, but this was not only about him. It was also about a young girl that would probably move in with him soon.

He stayed for about an hour, chatting with Claire, trying to fix the situation. She smile gradually grew and Dean was proud of himself for putting it there. He loved when she was honest and happy. He found out Claire thought that Die Hard was overrated, that her type of music was old school, she barely got her GED, that when her last boyfriend told her she was a bitch, she hit him and broke his nose, and that she doesn’t want to be alone anymore.

He was stunned from what she was keeping to herself. She had a whole world inside of her and no one to explore it. It was a pity, actually. She was an amazing person. And she kept it all buried inside of sarcasm, rude behavior and hunting. Just like him.

In a middle of conversation, Claire drifted to sleep, and that was his cue. He covered her with blanket, trying not to wake her up. She looked so peaceful, more than she have been since the day he met her. Dean smiled, leaving the room and heading to the hotel. Exiting the hospital, he unconsciously touched his lips, imagining someone else’s on them. Preferably lips that belonged to a feisty blonde that got him somehow hooked. 

He spotted a bar around the corner. He belonged in hell, but a bar could do for now.


	5. Chapter 5

“How long do I have to stay in this fucking hospital?” Claire asked Jodie, who was there for breakfast.

“The doctor didn’t give any precise date, but it seems like you dodged a bullet here, Claire. He said that you could easily have been paralyzed. Guess you have a guardian angel,” Jodie smiled, eating her noodles.

“Guardian angles, my ass. Dean said that Castiel won’t even answer his phone.”

She was actually relieved about that. She didn’t need another person telling her she was too young or inexperienced to hunt. She like Castiel, she really did, but the guy had his own problems. After Lucifer killed him, Dean and Sam fortunately brought him back, but he wasn’t the same. He was on a good way to become the old Cas, and didn’t mean to worry him with her problems.

A knock on the door broke her out of her thoughts.

“Speak of the devil,” Jody smirked after Dean entered the room.

Claire immediately tensed, remembering the night before. She should have been embarrassed, but she wasn’t. She actually felt wired, like seeing him inflamed every nerve in her body. Last night, she got an honest, raw reaction out of him, and it was euphoric. It was too bad it didn’t last long. She could see that he was having a mental debate with himself, and so was she. In her case, she told her brain to shut up, but in his case, the brain won. At least, that was her theory. And now he probably won’t even look at her again as more than his kid protegee.

“Do not mention that bastard anymore, please,” he sat on a chair next to Jody.

“Want some?” Jody asked him, offering their breakfast.

Dean smiled, “No thanks, you could say I’m a little hungover.”

He looked at Claire for a second. He truly was stupid hot. And his stubble, man, was it a turn on.

“When did you find time to drink, you dumbass? You should go to rehab, you know. I have never met a man who could handle alcohol like you do. Speaking of, I don’t remember you being hungover before. You must have had quite a night,” Jody laughed.

“Not in a good way,” he answered.

_What was that supposed to mean?_

“Well, now you learn from your mistakes,” Jody said, standing up. “Gotta go. Promised Sam I’d talk to him about something.”

Claire basically jumped out of bed, “Talk about what?”

Jody hurried out of the room, “Love ya, see you tonight.”

“Jody, wai-,” Claire tried to follow her but Jody was fast.

Claire returned to her bed, feeling completely useless. She wasn’t used to sitting in bed for a whole day. She was always full of energy, always finding something to do. Someone to kill. It was a problem. One of many.

“You don’t know what is going on by any chance, do you?” she asked batting her eyelashes shamelessly.

“Nope. I basically returned to bed a few hours ago,” he said. “But if they are talking about you-know-what, I’m sure that he’ll convince her.”

“Let’s hope so.”

They both went quiet. It was pretty uncomfortable, and Claire wanted to slap herself for allowing last night to happen. Technically nothing happened, and situation was this awkward. Claire couldn’t imagine how it would be if they really did something more. She knew that even if she wanted the man in front of her more than ever, he didn’t want her back. She had to deal with that, and the best cure for that was going to be in her room in a few minutes.

“You don’t have to be here, you know,” Claire said.

“I know,” Dean answered.

Even just by looking him, she felt captivated. She knew she had a problem, but Dean was in front of her, looking at some shitty magazine, smiling and shaking his head, making her feel so peaceful, elated. Fortunately, she could be a good actress when she wanted.

Doctor came by a few minutes later for her appointment, holding papers that probably needed signing.

“You need me to sign all of this shit, don’t you?” she sighed.

He laughed, “Not exactly. Just a few. Please forgive me.”

She smirked, taking the papers. Dean on the other side of the room was putting down his magazine and observing the two of them.

“Oh I see you two are already friendly,” she heard him saying, but didn’t look up from the papers. “What about you stop flirting and tell her the diagnosis, huh?”

Jamie collected himself and maintained his professional posture. Claire wanted to punch Dean for making him uncomfortable. Jamie was a decent man, and didn’t need Deans shit.

“So, Claire. You are a lucky woman,” he showed her the scans. “The blade punctured the skin but it didn’t injure any internal organs too bad. You had a small internal bleeding when your friends brought you in, but we fixed that. It wasn’t extreme. You know, it was a close one. I told your mother that you could have easily have been left paralyzed.”

“My mother is dead,” she stated and heard Dean chuckle when they saw Jamie’s face.

“Oh, I’m, I’m sorry, I didn’t know-,” he stumbled.

Claire smiled, “Don’t worry. It’s in the past.”

She thought it was funny when people got uncomfortable, and she loved making them. Dean knew that, and was quietly chuckling in the corner. Claire smiled again, she couldn’t help herself.

“Oh, okay, good,” Jamie cleared his throat. “You’d be free to go in a couple of days. . And you have to be still too, just for a day of two, so you get used to your stitches. Oh, and you should start sleeping on your stomach. I know it’s a lot, but your wound was deep, and had to put two layers of stitches. And in two weeks, you need to come back, so we can remove them. Got it?”

“Yup. And that’s when you’re gonna ask me on a date, right?” she smirked, hoping to catch him of-guard.

“Yeah. But only if you keep your fighting to minimum until the wound heals. Your sister told me you love karate, but you need to dial it down.”

Dean snorted, “Wouldn’t count on it, doc.”

Jamie turned around to face Dean. He didn’t look amused. “If you care for her getting better, you should stop her yourself. You’re the father figure here, right?”

That was low. Jamie knew that Dean was her friend, and even thought something more. Maybe he was jealous of Dean. Maybe that was his way of making sure nothing was happening between them. But Claire knew that Dean loathed the guy, and that he’d probably beat him in his own game.

“Not by a long shot, buddy,” Dean licked his lips. Claire loved when he did that. “Her father was possessed by an angel, my best friend actually.”

“I can see why not. You’re basically a kid yourself,” Jamie said shaking his head.

Jamie thought he would get a rise out of Dean, but he just smiled, “Yeah. Learned to live with it.”

Jamie stood there for a couple of seconds, then turned towards Claire, fake smiling, “I’ll see you later, Claire. Looking forward to that date.”

He left the room, when Alex came in, basically looking at his ass the entire time he was leaving.

“He is hot,” was the first thing she said.

“And Claire is going on a date with him,” Dean added shaking his head,

“Wow! Didn’t know you had it in you,” Alex smiled approvingly, settling beside Claire.

Alex didn’t always knew about Claire’s boyfriends. But they weren’t that many. Claire never really fell in love, so she didn’t see the meaning in sharing with her family. Alex actually thought that she was gay for a while. Claire found it amusing, and actually went with it just to mess with her and Jody. It didn’t last long, considering Alex caught her making out with the brother of the girl that was supposed to be her girlfriend.

She loved family visits.

“Are you fucking kidding me? He is too old for her!” he was pissed.

“Actually, not even ten years older. And I don’t care about age,” Claire answered.

“You know what? Do whatever you want. You’re a big girl now,” he practically yelled and stormed out of her room.

That man was truly something. Claire couldn’t understand him even if she took the course on ‘How to fucking live with Dean fucking Winchester’. But she wasn’t even that mad. She actually felt excited on knowing she would be able to live with him and learn him. She was fucking psycho.

“What’s his problem?” Alex asked.

“He’s being over protective.”

Alex smiled, opening her soda, “Noticed. He’s been around a lot recently. It’s kinda sweet in fact. From what I know, Sam is the caring one, but Claire, something is going on with Dean.”

“Don’t be stupid. He probably feels guilty of bringing me to that vampire den. It has very little to do with caring,” Claire said.

The sad thing was that Claire actually meant that. She didn’t think that anyone would care for her so much in such a short time without a reason.

“You are the one that’s stupid. So clueless,” Alex bickered but Claire ignored her,

“Let’s just see if Sam convince Jody in letting me live with the guys. That’s the main priority. Not analyzing Dean fucking Winchester,” she rolled her eyes, lying down.

She looked at the ceiling, wondering where the hell Dean went. He was unstable, and even if she was kinda mad at him, or Alex, or whoever, she cared. About everyone. About Dean. About herself. That was why she wanted to go with them. So Jody and Alex don’t have another funereal to plan. And she knew that Sam and Dean would make her into a better person. They made a lot of mistakes, but they are better people than the most. She would learn so much from them. And someday, she’ll deserve to go to heaven and tell her mom and dad about these amazing adventures that made her into a honorable person.

She just had to convince Jody. Piece of cake.


	6. Chapter 6

  
Day one

Instead of things getting better, it went the complete opposite way. Jody was still mad at Claire because she was reckless, at Sam for not being responsible enough, and at Dean for being an alcoholic and not visiting Claire that day. Claire was mad at herself for missing him after only a day. She was mad for getting attached. Dean didn’t really care for other people. Their lives? Yes. Their feelings? Hell no. She was like that too, until she met all of those people that cared for her. They made her a better person. She just thought that she could have a small part in making Dean a better person. _Guess not._

 

Day two

Jody, Alex and Sam visited her in the morning. Alex had to go back to school, so it was a hard goodbye. She loved that girl.   
Jody was having doubts about letting her move in with the Winchesters.   
Jamie spent his break with her. They talked about themselves, getting to know each other. She didn’t even know why was she leading on this man. She was lonely, yes, but she knew that if Dean walked in that room, Jamie wouldn’t exist. Too bad he didn’t pay her a visit in day and a half. _What was his problem?_

 

Day three

She started walking around the hospital. It was nice. Sam somehow convinced Jody that Claire can now make her own decisions, and that she was becoming a pretty damn good hunter. She was happy. For a while. When she asked about Dean, Sam seemed like he truly didn’t know what was going on with him. He was in and out the hotel room all the time.   
Sam and Jody decided to bring Claire with them for lunch, just so she could breathe some fresh air. They went to some small local diner, that supposedly had the best chicken soup. Jody wouldn’t stop about the fucking soup.

They sat in the booth, and waited about half an hour.

“Nice place, Jody,” Claire laughed, taunting her.

Jody rolled her eyes, looking around for a waitress, “It’s a good place, trust me. I just don’t know where the fucking waitress-”

Her face transformed in a second, looking at something behind Claire. She looked positively grossed out. Claire and Sam turned around to see what the problem was.

There, in front of the door, stood Dean and the fucking waitress, making out. Her shirt was wrinkled, and he didn’t even buckle his belt. Claire wanted to throw up. What was even happening? What was wrong with this man? Why did she care so much?

Jody coughed, drawing their attention. The waitress bit her lip, smiling, “Sorry. Be with you in a minute.”

She went to the kitchen, while Dean looked horrified. _Good._

He looked hesitant, walking towards them. Like he was really embarrassed and worried what they’ll think of him. Claire was glad. He was an asshole these few days, and she didn’t even know the reason why.

“I was wondering under what rock you’ve been hiding,” Jody said, “guess it wasn’t a rock.” She laughed, breaking the tension. _She seriously wasn’t mad? What the hell?_

“Hey. I’m on top kinda guy,” Dean smirked, sitting beside Jody.

“Didn’t need to know that,” she answered.

Claire looked at Dean for the first time since the incident with Jamie. He looked tired. Drained, actually. What was he doing with himself?

“This is getting ridiculous, Dean. You haven’t been to the hospital since Sunday, and now we find you hungover with a girl, and it’s not even two o’clock,” Sam intervened.

“So what? I can see she’s okay. Considering you brought her here,” she pointed at Claire.

“Wow. Nice,” Claire was shocked. That was not Dean. Not the one she knew. Not the one that spent the night with her, talking, almost kissing her.

“What the hell do you want me to say, Claire?”

“I want to know why have you been avoiding me? What did I do that was so terrible, that you won’t just check up on me? Or fucking send a text?” Claire lashed out.

“Language,” Jody interrupted.

“Fuck the language! I’m an adult for fuck’s sake! I’m sick of everyone treating me as a damn kid. I don’t know why I’m even looking for your approval, Jodie. I can live with whomever I want. And you,” she looked at Dean. “Fuck you. Just, just leave me alone. All of you,” she stood up and walked through the door as fast as she could, screaming inside.

 _They deserved that_ , she convinced herself.

Claire wasn’t the crying type. Whenever she would get upset, she would punch stuff. The mailbox was the first casualty. She kicked it, hurting herself in the process.

“Fuck!” she yelled in front of bunch of kids, with parents. _Perfect._

Her back hurt like hell and not she was basically limping. _Just perfect_. Why was her life a god damn tragedy? Was she destined to be miserable all the time? To lose her dad and be given up by her mom? To find another family just so she could feel like she didn’t belong? To grow to care for this amazing, stubborn man who will never care for her? If that was her fate, she’s doomed to a lonely life.

“Please, don’t hurt the kids,” she heard someone say behind her.

Claire turned around to see Dean, in all of his ‘the morning after’ glory. Except that it was noon. His eyes were red, either from the booze or lack of sleeping. His hair was messed up, which was kinda sexy to Claire. As well as the beard from not shaving a few days, and the shirt that he rarely wore, which was crime, considering how good did it look on him.

“You want me to punch you instead?” she answered, walking away from him. She didn’t need his bullshit talks about being better to Jody. He wasn’t exactly the role model these days.

“Just dial it down a notch,” he caught up with her, grabbing Claire by the forearm to face him.

“Dial what down?” she pulled back from his grip, still looking at him.

What was with Dean and his touching? She knew that it was innocent for him, but he didn’t know what went inside her body when he touched her. It was a whole new sensation to her. The warmth, electricity, and the feeling of loss when his touch was gone.

“Everything!” he yelled in her face. “I can’t keep up with you, Claire. No one can. I know you are young and energetic and think that the whole world is yours to conquer, but guess what? It’s not. There are people who are there to help you. We are here. Hunting isn’t everything. Family is everything. Love is everything.”

“Look how well that turned out for you. You have never been in a serious relationship, Dean! And you know why? Because you are a fucking hunter!” She didn’t care who was looking. That wan was getting on her nerves and if she couldn’t punch him there, she could yell at him.

“How did you turn this on me?” he was looking painfully frustrated. That’s exactly what she wanted.

“You tell me that you are here for me. But are you though? Where were you this two days? Just tell me this. Were you out, fucking, having fun the whole time I was laying in the hospital?” she pushed him. “Did you like it, huh? Did you at least like it?” She punched him in the chest. He wasn’t resisting.

“What do you want me to say, huh?” he grabbed her arms. “It was sex, Claire. People have it all the time. Get over it.” He let go of her and turned around, meaning to walk away from her. But the next moment he turned, like he was debating if he should say something or not.

“Why do you even care if I was there? You had your doctor to protect you at night,” somehow his voice turned into malice. She didn’t want to come to that.

“Screw you!” now it her turn to turn around and storm away from him.

What was his problem? Did he consider himself Claire’s some sort of protector? Maybe he was worried about what would Castiel say. Would he even care? Claire was nothing to him. To the both of them.

She turned around, facing him, “I don’t need a man to protect me. And if you really knew me, you’d know that.”

“Did- Did you two-” he tried to say, giving her a whiplash from his mood changes.

Did he actually meant sex? What the hell was wrong with him? First, he says that people have sex all the time, and then asks her like it was a fucking crime.

“No,” she was horrified with the question. “What person do you think I am, Dean?”

“I’m sorry,” he was almost whispering. “I just- you have no idea- fuck.”

He ran his hands through hair, groaning, probably trying to find some words. Was he going to insult her again? Or was he actually going to say something nice?

“I am sorry. I’m so sorry for being a jerk and not visiting you in days. You know that’s not who I am. You got to know me Claire, not many people do. Just don’t disappear like the rest of them,” he said.

That was not what she expected. Dean apologizing? She didn’t think it would happen in her wildest dreams.   
He actually cared for her. That was the part that shocked her the most. He cared for her. Her smile started to grow, and so did his. Dean reached out and hugged her. Claire’s cheeks hurt from smiling. _Was than what happiness tasted?_

“I don’t know if you’re heard, but you got yourself a new roommate,” she bit her lip still smiling in his embrace. He felt so good.

“I actually thought that you would decide that on your own. It was a wonder you made it this far with Jody breathing down your neck,” he smiled.

He backed away from the hug, but his arm was till on her hip. She tried now to show how much she was aware of it.

“I should go apologize to her,” Claire sighed, backing away from his touch. “And Dean? I told you if you let me come come that I would find you a soulmate. Game on.”


	7. Chapter 7

“Nice ass,” Claire said, walking trough the supermarket with Sam and Dean. She promised to find Dean a girl, because he didn’t believe he was worth it. Even though it hurt like a bitch, she knew they couldn’t be together. And all she wanted was to people around her be happy, even though she would never admit it out loud.

“I mean, she probably has a nice personality too,” she corrected herself. She started giggling, making people around them turn their heads.

They were getting supplies for the bunker, considering they haven’t been there in over a month. She offered to come with Sam, and Dean probably didn’t want to wait in the car. He was quiet the whole ride from the hospital. And even before that, the couple of days that she had to spend there just in case, Dean was nice and present, but quiet. Claire worried that he was maybe changing his mind. Maybe they didn’t want a girl messing up their dynamics, in house and at the hunt. Fortunately, Sam was a ray of sunshine. He convinced her basically every day that he couldn’t wait for her to come, and to meet Eileen (even though they saw each other once a month). He was cryptic about Dean. He said that Dean always has some issues, and she should get used to that. But from the stories, Sam was the one troubled, and Dean was making everybody smile, so it kinda didn’t make sense.

Sam was buying veggies and fruit at the other side of the supermarket, leaving Dean and Claire in charge of unhealthy stuff. Her favourite.

“You were actually serious about the soulmate finding stuff,” Dean said. He was looking trough the deserts section, and Claire was checking out his ass. Jesus, how was she going to live with that man?

“Of course. Promise is a promise,” she smiled. Dean turned to look at her for a second, pensive, thoughtful. What was on his mind all the time?

He finally smiled, offering her a pie, “Want one? Because I’m not sharing mine with anyone.”

Claire laughed, taking the pie out of his hand. They got a few snacks, and headed for the drinks. Claire was glad that she could legally drink now, just because of the adults and the nagging. The law never bothered Claire. She always found a way to get around it.

“You a beer or a vine kind of girl?” Dean opened the fridge, pulling one beer after another.

She laughed and helped him, “Beer. Had a lot of fun with tequila too.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dean asked.

“Nothin’. I had to fill time with something when there were no cases, you know? And I happened to be enrolled into some crappy college. Fortunately for me, that college had some amazing fraternities,” Claire bit her lip. She had some great times there. Sometimes, she wished that she could have a normal life, learning and partying. But, Claire knew that once you were in this life, there was no coming back. She wasn’t complaining, but she still had to get used to it.

“So that’s your no so subtle way of saying that you used to get trashed, partied and hooked up with frat boys, right?” He still unloaded the beer, not looking at her once.

She stopped helping, and stood in front of him, hand on hips. She was about to try something risky. And since she had no filter, she couldn’t help herself.

“You sound jealous,” Claire bit her lip waiting for a reaction.

Unfortunately for her, it was Dean that she was talking to.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” was his only answer.

She shouldn’t be surprised, Dean clearly saw her as a little girl, a friend. She was disappointed, though. At least she tried. And she should stop trying,because it was so hopeless.

“Those guys have nothing on me,” he looked down on her, smirking.

Claire almost had an heart attack, right there. Was Dean actually flirting? Was it just a joke? She looked up to him, baffled, trying to come up with something smart to say. She wouldn’t admit it out loud, but she realized in that moment why did all of Dean’s girls looked so dumb. It wasn’t them. It was that stupidly hot, charming man that was making them that way. But she wasn’t one of those girls.

She composed herself. Maybe he was just joking around with a friend. Her. He considered her a friend. Probably.

“They really don’t,” Claire smiled, trying to see if she could baffle him, too. It wasn’t a friendly smile, though. She used it when she wanted to get laid. She just hoped it would work on expert.

He inhaled, still looking at her, standing really close. Claire could see his jaw clenching, and she stepped closer, provoking him. He took a step back, but Claire wouldn’t have it. Dean couldn’t play with her that way. She wasn’t just another dumb girl. She backed him up the fridge, and moved away just so she could see his whole face. He let out an exasperated sound, not looking at her once.

“What’s wrong Dean?” she smiled innocently.

Claire knew that s he was just testing his patience, but she needed to know what was going on between them. She never thought that Dean Winchester would make her this crazy. Yeah, Claire wasn’t a nun, but she never tempted a man, her friend, who was twenty years older at that, in a fucking supermarket.

She started playing with the hem of his shirt, just barely touching his skin. He still wouldn’t look at her, which made her start doubting. What if she was making a huge mistake here?

“Claire..” he groaned, his head falling backwards. He sounded pained, exhausted.

That made her close the distance and put her hands under his shirt, touching his stomach, moving them all over him. It was risky, too risky, she knew that. But Dean was like some kind of drug. She knew that sounded cliche, but it was the truth. His every breath, every movements of his muscles, was drawing her in, devouring her. The same Dean Winchester that she wanted to kill a few years back.

“Don’t,” he barely whispered, not sounding convincing at all.

Claire’s breath became ragged, as she stood on her toes, trying to get his attention. He finally looked at her, with thirsty eyes and dry lips.

“Why not?” she breathed in his mouth, full of need. Until that moment, she didn’t realize how much she needed him. Not just his lips. She needed him whole, body and mind.

The only thing that she needed to show these feelings was a little spark of interest from Dean. Now that Claire got it, she knew that she was screwed.

“Guys? You here?” Sam’s voice was like a cold shower to the both of them. Claire stepped back, while Dean turned around, looking like he was fixing the damn fridge. _Really smooth._

“Here,” she found her voice, although it sounded like a squeak. She squeaked a lot around Dean.

Sam showed up, holding healthy stuff, smiling. _How was he always smiling?_

“Dean, what’s wrong?” he asked immediately.

Dean turned around, trying to fake smile. She was too.

“Nothin’. Why’d you ask?” Dean wouldn’t look at her. And she couldn’t even blame him. She crossed the line, for the hundredth time.

“You’re doing that thing when you excessively flex when you are nervous,” Sam smiled, not having an idea what had just happened.

What would he think of Claire if he’d known? Little brat seeking attention? Daddy issues? It was not good, either way. She was surprised Dean didn’t tell him. Or anyone at that matter.

Dean laughed, and it was so painfully beautiful even if it was fake. He looked at the bags that Sam was carrying, “Yeah, I was imagining all of the healthy shit you would make us eat when we go home. I got chills, man.”

“Shut up,” Sam laughed along with him, while Claire tried to stop her heart from thumping so damn loud. She was way over her head.

The ride was uncomfortable, to say at least. She kept trying to make eye contact with Dean, just to see if he wasn’t pissed at her, but the idiot wouldn’t look away from the road, not even to talk with Sam. She gave up eventually, and drifted to sleep.  
.  
.  
.  
Dean gave up after some time and looked at her. She was asleep. Good. Sam was listening to his music, and he finally had time to breathe. And think. What the fucking hell was he doing? He wasn’t feeling like himself recently, flirting and fighting with adolescents. She was getting under his skin. It was bad. Really bad. Claire was reckless, and she caught him off guard every single time. She was fucking beautiful, and he was a man after all. But then Castiel comes to his mind, and Jody, and the looks on their faces if they saw him with Claire. Not that that was ever going to happen. She was sly, and damn wasn’t that a turn on, but his brain always took the charge after a while. Dean started feeling strange around her, and that would stop only when he convince her that there wasn’t anything between them.

That was a little hard, though, because he was finding hard to convince himself. He looked at her in a rear view mirror, sleeping, and just admired her beauty, her strength. Dean felt like he was supposed to protect her from the world, even if she chose this life. He hadn’t felt that way since Sammy grew into this responsible, amazing man that he was so proud of. They were getting older, and even though they will always need each other, it wasn’t the same. Maybe he needed a meaning, a purpose in life. Maybe it was a coincidence they ran into this wild, blonde girl a week ago, celebrating her birthday, and smiling after a long while. He rarely thought of her before that, because he knew she had Jody to protect her. Now, everything was different. _How the fuck did everything change in a week?_

He parked Baby in the garage, and told Sam to wake Claire. He couldn’t look at her. Dean already felt awful, like he was using her. She murmured something and wouldn’t woke up. Sam was practically dying of laughter. After a minute of Sam’s gentle pats on the shoulder, Dean honked the siren which made her jump right away.

“What?” she practically yelled, making Dean smile.

“You know, with that reflexes, it’s a wonder you’re still alive,” Sam said, smiling.

She rolled her eyes, and Dean groaned, involuntarily. Why was that so hot? He wanted to kick himself just for thinking that.

They unloaded groceries from the trunk, along with Claire’s one backpack. She really was a hunter. That literally send chills down Dean’s spine. He was scared. _What if she wasn’t ready?_

They took her on a tour of the bunker. It was their home, and they were proud of it. Then, they showed Claire her new room, and she didn’t look disappointed at all. Dean was strangely relieved.

“You should get some rest. That idiot doctor said that you should go easy on the karate practices until the wound heals,” Dean smirked, trying to ease the tension between them.

“I thought you didn’t care what Jamie said, since he called you a kid,” she smiled.

He didn’t care about the douchebag, not even a little. He just wanted her to learn to take care of herself, and stop being reckless all the time.

“Well, look at it this way. If you keep calm and get better faster, you could go on that date with the douchebag, right,” why was he such a fucking masochist?

Her smile dropped, “Right.”

He couldn’t just stand there and imagine that date, his hands on her, his lips on hers. It just wasn’t right. He needed to get his mind off that. Bar. Thank god they had a full bar in the bunker.

“Well, have a nice sleep. And welcome,” he sounded like a robot even to himself.

She smiled, and said goodnight to Sam, leaving the two of them alone, like always.

“What was that?” Sam asked, walking to the kitchen with Dean.

“I was polite,” he answered.

“Exactly. Polite. Where was the snarky, sarcastic, jerk Dean?” he smirked, taking the beer that Dean was handing him.

He loved his little brother, but he wouldn’t understand. Hell, not even Dean understood what was going on.

He just smiled, and opened his beer, “Shut up, Sammy.”


	8. Chapter 8

Claire was used to waking up in strange beds. Hotels, friends, even her car. But this was different. It was, because she knew that down the hall was Dean Winchester, probably half naked, waking up, stretching. Every girl’s dream, right? Except, it was a torture. She needed to get a grip, and it was so hard.

A phone message snapped her out of her thoughts. It was Castiel. Fuck. She forgot to tell him that she ran into Winchesters, and not to mention that she started living with them. The two of them had a steady communication. They either texted or chatted once or twice a month, and it was enough. They knew what was going on in each others lives, and t was nice. Not having a father, but a friend. But Claire wondered if he still felt an obligation to her, or maybe he actually liked talking to her. Maybe even considered her as a friend.

_Claire. Why didn’t you tell me you moved in with Sam and Dean? :(_

Claire laughed. That guy loved emoticons.

_Sorry. Forgot. Why don’t you visit? I know you missed them._

She waited a couple of seconds, when another message popped up.

_How do you think I knew you were here?_

She didn’t understand. Did the guys told him?

Someone knocked at the door, making her jump. She muttered a ‘come in’, getting out of bed. A familiar face came into the room, smiling widely at her.

“Cas!” she almost yelled, running to him, and hugging him.

“Hey Claire,” he smiled.

God, Claire missed him. She didn’t know how did they got that close, but she was glad that it turned out that way. He was one of the rare constants in her life.

“Where have you been?” she asked, detaching herself.

He was still smiling, “Around. Exploring the Earth. Healing. You know, same old.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re back.”

They talked for a while in her room. Him, telling Claire about some extraordinary,beautiful places that she needed to visit, and her, telling Cas about all the kills that he missed. After a while Sam yelled that the dinned was ready, making them stare at each other in wonder and laugh. They didn’t know that the Winchesters did that sort of ordinary stuff, like family dinners. Claire just guessed they ate when they had the time.

They went to the kitchen, where Sam was grinning and showing of his culinary skills, and Dean was sitting at the table, looking like he was starving, probably waiting for them.

“Figured this is a special occasion, and we deserve to have some family breakfast,” Sam said.

They sat at the table, Claire impressed at the sight of all the food. Sam was full of wonders. She fist bumped with him, and he looked really proud of himself. She loved people who found happiness in the smallest things. Those were the one that greatly appreciated the world.

On the other side of the table, Dean was stuffing his mouth with everything he found. Claire smiled, feeling at ease. The whole situation was so weird, and yet it felt was so normal. She loved it.

They ate in the silence for a while, all of them dealing with their own problems. But somehow, it was peaceful. That is, until Cas did what he new best. Made situation awkward.

“Dean, do you think I’m too old for a relationship?”

Claire started laughing, along with Sam. Dean looked him, not even surprised. Guess Castiel always asked weird ass questions.

“Dude, you’re like forty, so yeah,” Dean answered.

“How would you know? When was the last time you had one?” Claire blurted, not even realizing what she said.

Oh shit. Oh shit. She shouldn’t have said that.

Sam looked at her, taken aback. Cas looked absolutely clueless. And Dean, well he was pissed, like every fucking time that he talked with her.

“When was the last time you had one? Oh, I’m sorry. Did you ever even had an relationship?” he looked at her, challenged her.

What the hell was wrong with him? Did he actually thought that she was still a child? Or that angry teenager that tried to kill him? Or was he being just plain mean?

“Not Jimmy. Me. I’m really old,” Castiel spoke.

“Fuck you. You can mock me all you want, but I’m not the coward here. You are,” she spat, beyond frustrated.

Sam was still observing. She couldn’t just sit there and pretend everything was okay. It wasn’t. Something was going on between them, and he wouldn’t admit it. He wanted to play dumb, and she wasn’t in the mood for that. She hurried out of that room, away from Dean, and all of their looks. She needed to clear her head, to breathe some air. But the bunker was a fucking maze. She was sleepy when they got there, so it took her a while to find an exit. A walk. That would clear her head. Maybe a bus would hit her and she could forget all of this bullshit. _Ah, that would be nice._

She walked, further and further from the bunker. Until now, her only wish was to hunt with the best hunters there are. Sam and Dean. She even got to live with them. But now, walking away from their home seemed more alluring than turning around and continuing the charade. She shouldn’t have liked him. A fucking mistake. She didn’t realize how screwed up they both are, how same they are. And they say that opposites attract. They should’ve been her fist sign.

She walked by some shady guys, looking at her like she was meat. She shuddered, looking for her knife that she always kept in the front pocket of her jacket. And considering her luck, she forgot to put it on. Nice.

She wasn’t scared, just annoyed. She knew that the best way of dealing with them was to avoid them, or run, but a part of her wanted to fight. She wanted to punch something, someone. And considering that ‘someone’ could crush her into pieces (she wasn’t ashamed to say that Dean Winchester was fucking intimidating), these idiots would do.

“Baby, come here to warm me up. Or would you prefer the other way around?” she heard a voice behind her.

Finally. A punching bag. She turned around, smiling. The sleazy guy whistled and his friends made their way towards her. There were at least three or four of them. It would be a nice practice for her.

“Oh, I’ll warm you up honey, don’t worry about that.”

 .

 .

 .

Dean was pissed. For her to tell him that he was a coward? He was not a coward. He was responsible. She was young and thought that she liked him. He was bound to convince her otherwise. She was basically Jody’s daughter, for god’s sake. What would they think of him?

She left the table, and there was a silence for a while. Cas didn’t understand, and Dean was glad for that. But he could see that Sam was figuring some stuff out. He had his doubts. And Dean couldn’t fall lower in his brother eyes.

“What was that?” Sam finally spoke.

“She’s just a troubled kid,” he answered.

“And for some reason she doesn’t like you very much,” Cas said. “Is it because you murdered her friend a few years ago?”

“Subtle,” Sam snorted.

“I don’t know, Cas. I think we’re past that, though,” Dean smiled and stood up, looking for an excuse to get out of that room.

He couldn’t answer more questions, considering he wasn’t in the loop himself. He needed to make things clear with Claire.

“I’ll see if I can figure out what the problem is,” Dean said.

He got out of the room as fast as he could, and started looking for Claire. He searched every corner of the bunker, and she wasn’t there. That girl was a torture. The bunker door was half open. At least she could cover her tracks better.

He searched the streets, driving past kids, couples, parents. They didn’t even realize how lucky they were. They were in charge of their destiny. They could fall in love, build a family, without an ounce of regret. They were oblivious of the real threats in the world. So lucky.

 _Well, fuck them._ He wouldn’t change his life for anything. Yeah, they were happy, but so was he. He had his little family too. He may never have kids, but he experienced fatherhood. It was nice, but not a deal breaker. Nothing could keep him away from Sam and hunting. He just needed to surround himself with people with the same opinions and goals. Then he wouldn’t feel the need to always explain himself to people. Women, to be precise. They always have the need to ask annoying questions, not knowing the life he was leading. He would lie, but would always feel like an outcast, for not having a wife or kids, or anyone besides his brother, at that.

Claire naively promised to find him a ‘soulmate’, but what she didn’t know was that he knew, that for him, it doesn’t exist. Yeah, he said that he felt he didn’t deserve one. And he didn’t. But the thing was that no one would stick around long enough that he could call a soulmate.

He was now actually worried. What if Claire ran away? What is she hated him? That was what he wanted. He did this. He was a coward. He would never admit it out lout, but he was. And he made a girl who just moved in, run away.

He wanted to call Sam or Cas. He should admit everything.

“You bitch!”

Someone yelled, breaking Dean out of his thoughts. He saw a couple of guys a few meters away. They seemed to be fighting, and in the middle of the commotion was a crazy blond. Of course she would pick a fight. She was Claire. He hurried out of the car and into the fight. Claire was outnumbered, but she seemed to like that. He knew that trill, but never thought that there would be someone that insane beside him.

“Hey!” he yelled, trying to scare the guys away.

The only thing that he accomplished was one of them coming towards him, probably not looking for a talk. They were just people, Dean reminded himself. He shouldn’t use a knife or a gun.

“You don’t wanna to do this,” he said, warning him.

“Oh, but I really do. This little bitch is next when I’m done with you.” he smiled wickedly, raising his knife.

“The four of you couldn’t touch her, so I would say she’s not that little. And yeah, she could be annoying from time to time, but I wouldn’t call her a bitch, buddy.”

The guy lounged at him, knife in his hand. Dean didn’t even have to move. He grabbed the guy’s hand and twisted it, making him drop the knife. He yelled in pain, collapsing on the ground. Dean kneeled, smiling.

“I told you not to call her a bitch,” he punched the idiot in the face.

He fell to the ground, unconscious. Dean looked in front of him. Two of Claire’s attackers were on the ground, and she was dealing with the last one. The guy was chocking her. Dean started running towards them, getting his gun, unlocking it and pointing it at the man. Without thinking, he fired the gun. He shot him. Once, twice. Time stopped, and the only thing that mattered was his gun and the target. He would shoot again, but he heard a voice, screaming his name.

“Dean! Dean, the police will find us. Dean, move!”

He looked around, at the unconscious bodies around him. And Claire. Her hands were on his shoulders, trembling. He looked at her face. She was terrified.

“I am so sorry. Let’s go, please. Please,” she begged, shaking him.

He sobered up, taking her hand in his and running towards his car. He started the engine, not turning around to the bunker. He just drove, away from the mess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait. I already have half of the next chapter, so you won't have to wait too long :)


	9. Chapter 9

  
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Dean. He would’ve killed me,” Claire whispered.

“I killed a civilian. Because of you. You started the fucking fight!” he was yelling and driving like a maniac.

She didn’t expect that. She probably thought that Dean would blame himself, which was partially true. But he got his confirmation that she started the fight when she didn’t deny it. Claire was so fucking reckless all the time. He knew it would be a challenge living with her, considering her history of bad mistakes and reckless decisions, but the girl wouldn’t grow up.

“He shouldn’t have provoked me!”

“They are lowlifes, Claire! All they do is provoke people. I just thought that you wouldn’t be that stupid to fall for it,” he was beyond frustrated.

He just kept driving, not knowing where they were heading, not caring where they were. He wanted to punch something.

And apparently, he wasn’t the only one. On his right, Claire was opening the door, the car still moving.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” he yelled, clutching her forearm, pulling her in. But she was persistent, so Dean had to stop the car, so she wouldn’t kill herself.

Claire got out of the Impala and started walking, away for the car, from him. Probably not even knowing where she was heading. Well, that made two of them. He opened the door, following her. It was cold, and she was in a t shirt. He got out of his coat, while closing in on her. Claire wouldn’t even turn around. Why was he the bad guy now? Dean offered her the coat, but she just kept walking faster.

“Stop being a child!” he yelled, immediately regretting it. He knew it was a touchy subject for the two of them.

“Fuck you!” she yelled back, turning around. In a single moment, he felt a slap on the cheek. Claire slapped him. She fucking did that.

Every time that he thought he was a good judgment character, that girl would surprise him. She slapped him, and it was fucking hot. He put a hand on the cheek, smiling. She looked completely clueless, looking at him with those doe blue eyes, all innocent, even after she hit him. He licked his lips, not even realizing it.

“Why are you smiling?” she crossed her arms over her chest, not helping Dean. Not at all.

Fuck, he was mad at her, not turned on. He had issues.

“Take my coat,” he offered again, “please.”

Claire still looked confused, but she took it. It was huge on her, but at least she won’t be cold.  
.  
.  
.

She slapped Dean. Oh god. She was so screwed. Why couldn’t she control her temper, just for once? She prepared herself for a verbal assault, but instead, the moron smiled. Like he was entertained. She asked him why was he smiling, but he wouldn’t answer, just offered his coat. Was he allergic to straight answers? She put on the coat, not wanting to argue anymore, and felt a sharp pain trough her back. She almost collapsed to the ground, but Dean caught her, worry showing all over his face. She didn’t wanna worry him. 

“Hey, hey, hey. What’s wrong? Claire, what’s wrong?” he held her, testing is she could walk. When she didn’t move, and the pain consumed her whole body, he picked her up and carried her to the car.

“Hurts,” she murmured, barely, though the pain.

Dean laid her on the backseat, carefully, but it was still painful. Her vision started to blur. Dean was talking to her, but she could only hear some fragments. She tried to stay awake as long as she could.

“It’s going to be okay. Everything will be alright. Please, just stay with me. Stay with me, baby,” she didn’t know if he was whispering, or if she was just blacking out.

She tried to answer, to convince him it will be okay, but she could barely hear her own thoughts trough the pain. Everything went black, and the last thing she saw was Dean’s wild driving trough the empty streets, and her blood covering the coat.

 

She never had dreams. Not since her mom left. It was weird growing up, without dreaming. But she got used to it, it toughened her up. And she learned how to take care of herself in the real world, not having dreams. She just needed to stay alive. And she succeeded. But she couldn’t help but wonder, when would her dreams come back, and will they?

 

“What are we going to do?” she heard rushed voices around her.

“I don’t know. I killed a man, and she was involved. I don’t know if it would be smart to go to the hospital,” she could practically see Dean, running hands trough his hair, pacing around the room. She would smile if she could.

“No more hospitals,” she squeaked, opening her eyes. The three of them were huddled around her bed, faces full of worry.

“What happened out there, Claire?” Dean asked, taking her hand. It was innocent for him, but she was hyper aware of it, even in this condition.

“My back,” she said, grimacing in pain. She stood up, and somehow walked to the mirror. She turned around, pulling her shirt up, so she could see her back. She wished she didn’t. Her wound was bleeding, and all around it was a purple bruise.

Dean came closer, carefully touching her skin, around the wound. She winced in pain. He guided her back to the bed, sitting beside her. He knew how she got the bruise, and he was disappointed. She was a reckless kid after all.

“What the hell is that?” Sam asked.

The two of them were looking at her, expecting some reasonable explanation. They needed to know that it was not her fault. But she would have to let them down. She always lets people down.

“I don’t know if Dean told you guys, but I got into a fight,” she looked at the floor. “I may have-”

“Some guys attacked her, and she defended herself,” Dean cut her off.

She looked at him, not believing her ears. Dean was actually helping her. _Well, that’s new._

“I’m so sorry I can’t help you, Claire,” Cas said. “I feel useless without my grace.”

How was he so good and kind all the time? Sam smiled, patting her shoulder. They asked her if she was sure about the hospital, and they looked so concerned. It was touching, really. But she was sick of the hospitals, and she just wanted to lay in bed, and sleep.

“It’s not a big deal. I blacked out because the adrenaline left my system, and I felt the consequences of the beating I got. The guy cut me with his knife and the would opened, probably. But I’m a little better now,” she smiled, reassuring them. “Seriously guys, don’t worry. One of you two can patch me up. I know you’ve done it before. You’d not be in one piece right now, if you didn’t.”

It took a little bit more convincing, but they finally realized that she would be okay. Sam volunteered to patch her up. All of them left the room, and she could finally breathe. She felt like a kid around them. They treated her like one. But it wasn’t all on them. Her actions had consequences and she needed to realize that.

She removed her blood soaked t shirt, sitting in bed in bra. She couldn’t get stitches in a shirt, and she knew that Sam wouldn’t mind. She saw him as a big brother, and she had a feeling that he reciprocated the feeling.

What she didn’t expect, was Dean entering the room. _Of fucking course._ Claire quickly tuned around, suddenly feeling overly self-conscious.

“Change of plans. Sam had to go out, so I’m your doctor for the night,” he softly laughed.

She was still looking at the opposite wall, her back at him. She never had a problem with her body. Why the fuck was she acting so weird?

Dean put his hand on her hips, turning her around, “We can’t do this in that position, Claire.”

She blushed all of the sudden, not being able to control herself around him. “What?” she squealed. Again. _Nice._

“You have to lay down,” he chuckled, watching her all confused.

“Oh, yeah. Right,” she was still aware of his hands, not moving an inch.

Claire wouldn’t look at him. She couldn’t endure all of that anymore. She needed to stop daydreaming. Her life was based on not dreaming. On the reality. She knew all of that touching didn’t mean a single thing to him. He was probably not aware of the touches, of the looks and said words. It was all innocent for him. And she kept reading into things.

She laid down on the bed, giving him better access to the wound. Dean started with the stitches, which kinda hurt. But not even close to when she was stabbed. She winced now and then, but it wasn’t that bad.

“Dean,” she started, “why did you cover for me?”

She could feel him tense beside her,”I think that you realize that you made a mistake, and that you regret it. You didn’t need their disapproval, considering you had enough from me.” He laughed.

“I’m sorry for the slap, Dean. I really am,” she was desperately hoping he wouldn’t hold that against her.

“Oh, don’t be sorry,” he said, his voice lower, sending chills trough her whole body.

She kept still for the most time, but it wasn’t that easy having him that close and staying calm. Every time she winced, he would put his arm on her bare hip, trying to calm her, but it was having the opposite effect. She just hoped he wouldn’t feel her heart thumping like some lovesick kid. It was weird, because she never got to that faze. She never really fell in love, and it was sad. It was even sadder that she was experiencing something like that for the first time with the guy she had no chance with.

“Done,” she could hear Den behind her.

She winced, sitting up, and covered herself with the bloody tee shirt. She felt too exposed.

“Oh come on. I’ve seen lots of women in their bras, and without them at that. You don’t have to cover with that dirty thing,” he smirked.

Claire rolled her eyes, not enjoying the new direction that conversation was heading to, “Wow, nice. Let’s not get into that, buddy.”

“Why not, Claire?” he sat beside her.

“Because it’s gross, Dean! You treat women like shit! And you like to brag about it. It bothers me, okay?” she stood up and started pacing the room. He got on her nerves a lot, recently.

“Is that really what bothers you?” he licked his lips. And she got even more mad.

What the hell was wrong with him? That guy had a problem, that was for sure. He needed to stop giving her hope. It was cruel, to say at least. She was just a girl, for god’s sake. He was a grown man, and shouldn’t be playing games.

"What do you want, Dean?" she was exhausted.

He looked as she felt. Even though he clearly showed her that he wasn't interested, she could see it in his eyes that this thing they had, it wasn't easy for him. She didn't like seeing him like that.

"I don't know. I don't know what's happening to me. You, you are so, but I.." he stammered.

She just kept looking at him, trying to decipher him. It was not easy. The whole situation was not easy. I may seemed like it was easier for her, because she wasn't the one having a mental debate with herself, but she had other problems. She was just a girl after all, and she never felt flying so close to fire like she did at that moment.

"I don't know either," she cut him off. "But it's messing up our lives, and we need to deal with it."

He looked up, and stared at her for what felt like eternity. It was crazy, what it was doing to her. She forgot about the pain in her back, forgot that two other people are in the bunker with them, forgot about the age difference. Dean was beyond beautiful. She knew that he would kick her ass if she said that aloud, but it was true. The was no one like the man sitting in front of her. The man that may have feelings for her. Dean stood up, and in one swift move closed the distance between them. He was basically pinning her against the wall, and she needed to use all of her willpower not let out any embarrassing sounds,

He breathed, their mouths inches away, "Maybe if we get over with this, we can move on with our lives. I can't go on like this, it's fucking with my brain."

There it was. A confession, finally. Even if it wasn't what she was hoping for, it was still an honest confession. She wasn't the only one, she wasn't imagining things. It was such a relief, knowing she wasn't going nuts. And maybe if they did this, the tension would fade. She needed it to fade, so badly.

He stood there, just looking at her, breathing the same air. Why wouldn’t he move?

“Then get it over with!” she was hurt and excited at the same time. It was all so fucking messy. She groaned in frustration, making him dip and slam his lips on hers.

You know in a movie, when the camera would circle around lovey dovey couple that was kissing, making their own little universe. The kind of movies that Claire would never watch. Or that was what she tells everyone. Well, that was what she felt at that moment. She felt mature, and awakened. It was a whole new world to her. Dean was gentle at first, but as they continued, it got heated. Like, really heated. His hands roamed her body, but didn't cross any boundaries. Unfortunately, that was only making her more turned on. Her breathing was erratic. She curved her back, leaving no distance between them. She felt his member harden, and grinded on Dean, enjoying the sensation. He groaned in her mouth, and gripped her hair, still kissing her. She had no space to move. He trapped her between him and wall and she loved it. They started this thing, and she knew it wouldn’t be enough. She put her hands under his shirt, gently feeling him. She started lowering them, and gripped the waistband of his boxers.

Dean suddenly jerked away, looking terrified. “Don’t do that ever again.”

She was lost. Seconds away he was basically feeling her up. Where was the line?

“What’s wrong?” she tried to calm her breathing.

“You didn’t just fucking ask me that! Claire, this isn’t going further than this. I;m sorry if I led you on, but this was a mistake. It’s not happening again, you need to understand that.”

“Get out,” she said.

“What?”

“Get the fuck out!” she was now yelling, opening the door for him. She would shove him out if she had to.

He shook his head in frustration. Like she was a child. Like he was disappointing in her. _Fucking perfect._ She slammed the door as soon as he was out of the room. She felt like screaming, or punching something. She always wanted to punch something. But instead, she felt her eyes watering up. _Isn’t this just peachy._ She was going to cry like a little girl.

Nope. Not gonna happen. She picked up her phone, dialing. After a few seconds, a voice answered. “Long time. Missed me?”

“You wish,” she smiled. “I’m in Lebanon. I know you’re in Kansas right now, so why don’t you come and check out my new crib?”

Adrian was a moody little bastard, but he never turned her down. She could hear him chuckling on the other line, “Sure babe. I’m gonna be the girl in this relationship and say that I missed you. Be there soon.”

“First of all, that was extremely sexist. Second, this is not a relationship,” she groaned in frustration.

“You keep telling yourself that,” he said and hung up.

She threw her phone back on her bead, not being able to stand still. Instead of accepting the rejection, she did the worst thing she could, and it was going to bite her in the ass. _It’s going to be fun._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait. I was out of the country and had no inspiration.  
> Hope you like the new chapter :)


	10. Chapter 10

  
She made a huge mistake. Dean was going to end her. Only a few people knew about the bunker location, and she just told a random guy where she was. Well, Adrian wasn’t that random, but he was still a civilian. A reckless civilian. Even though they knew each other for a few months, she knew that much. They drew each other because they were the same. They became some sort of friends after one incident at college when he witnessed a girl being attacked by a vampire. She filled him up about hunting, creatures, and the rest of the usual bullshit they tell people, and he stayed away. He wasn’t scared, he just didn’t care. Claire uses the term ‘occasional fuck buddies’ when describing the two of them, and Adrian just goes with it. She sometimes thinks that he wants more, but that boy wasn’t serious enough for a relationship. And relationship with a hunter was about ten times harder than a regular one.

She needed to find a way to tell Dean, and it wasn’t going to be pretty. She walked to the kitchen, finding Sam reading a book, and looking as peaceful as ever. She smiled, sitting beside him at the table. He looked up, nearly jumping.

“You hunter reflexes are getting rusty, buddy,” she laughed.

“Hey, I just came back from a hunt. Give me a break, kid.”

“Fine, fine. Where was Cas?”

Sam put down his book, giving her full attention, “With me. Dean told us about the case, and that he would stay with you last night.”

“He didn’t tell me anything,” she said, “Wait. He willingly didn’t go to a hunt? To babysit me?”

Sam frowned, “Something is going on with him. He seems always worried, on edge. He says it’s nothing, but I don’t buy it. I know him.”

She didn’t know if she should be flattered or worried. It was like he wanted her, but was too scared. Or she was just misreading signals like always.

“Don’t worry. Dean is just-” she started to say when she saw him, leaning against the kitchen doorway, looking at them.

“Dean is just what?” He asked, challenging.

She bit her lip, trying to look like he doesn’t bother her. Like his tousled hair, or his morning voice, or his boxers that showed everything right. He was driving her insane. Fuck. It was like she had no self control.

Sam cleared his throat, looking at her. She was probably staring for too long.

“Nothin’. Sam and I were just talking about jerks in the world. Guess who was at the top of the list?” she smiled innocently.

He smirked, and walked into the kitchen, joining them at the table. She backed away without thinking, not wanting to be near him, and wanting to consume his personal space at the same time.

“How was the hunt?” he asked Sam, ignoring Claire.

“Piece of cake. Cas had to go, though. Jack got into some kind of trouble,” he laughed. “Don’t even wanna know.”

Claire never met the guy, but she heard stories. He was living with the Winchesters for a while, and when he got adjusted, Cas took him with him to travel, and learn.

“He’s even worst than Cas, when he came to Earth,” Dean laughed.

She smiled, imagining what he was like then. But then remembered that her father gave his body to this angel that ruined her childhood, and suddenly she wasn’t feeling like smiling anymore.

Dean looked at her, realizing what he’d said, “Shit. Sorry, Claire, I know it was rough for you. Sorry for even mentioning it.”

He took her arm under the table, making the whole situation unbelievable. A few hours ago he was apologizing for leading her on, and now he was holding her hand like a teenager. She pulled her hand away, not looking at him. She wasn’t going to be played with.

Dean made them coffee, while she was gathering the courage to tell them about Adrian. She just hoped Sam wouldn’t leave them alone. That would be messy.

No, she had to own up to her mistake. She cleared her throat, “Guys, so, don’t be mad,” she looked at Dean. “But I kinda invited a friend to the bunker.”

She left out the part where her ego was hurt by Dean, and she wanted to get back to him. She was never petty, but this man is bringing the worst in her.

“You did what?” Dean stared at her.

She tried to play it cool, because she didn’t need Dean to know that she regrets it. “Yeah, a buddy of mine was close by, so I invited him.”

“And you trust him?” Sam asked.

“Generally, no. But he knows about me and what I do, so I know he can keep a secret.”

Dean was getting angrier by the second. She was always going to make mistakes and be a failure in his eyes, she just needed to get used to it.

“So this guy is so special that you told him you are a hunter?”

She didn’t have it in her to argue. They always argued. “Why do you care?” She looked at Sam, ”Is it a problem? He won’t bother you, he’ll be in my room most of the time.”

Sam smiled, “Of course. Claire, you’re 21. You don’t need our permission. Although, please don’t tell anyone else. I know you said you kinda trust him, but we shouldn’t risk with others.”

She smiled, wishing for a brother like him. He was always there for Dean, always positive and full of hope and Dean didn’t appreciate it enough. She always wanted a brother.

Adrian sent her a text in that moment, telling her to meet her in front of the bunker.

“Be nice. Please,” she said to Dean.

“That’s my middle name, baby girl,” he licked his lips, looking at her.

She just rolled her eyes dramatically and stormed out of there before he could see the blush creeping up her cheeks. He was doing that on purpose. _Jerk._

She was glad that Dean wasn’t joining her. She needed to clear the air with Adrian, before introducing him to the guys. He parked a minute away, just as she asked. He was leaning against his old jeep, trying to look macho and what not, and she just rolled her eyes. He was wearing a leather jacket, black shirt and black pants, combined with his blonde hair. His usual style.

“Missed ya,” he said as she was closing up on him, and tried to kiss her. She expected that so she just gave him a peck on the lips, leaving him groaning in frustration.

“Prude much?” he recovered from the ‘rejection’ and laughed.

She laughed along, her mood lifting. She didn’t know what she wanted from the guy, but she did know that she needed more positivity in her life. And Adrian is as close to that as it gets.

“Ground rules. No PDA, no stupid jokes, no acting like a spoiled mama’s boy, and try not to piss off Dean. He’s got these anger issues and you don’t wanna see him worked up,” she cleared it up.

The problem was, that one of the reasons that she brought Adrian, was to make him angry. She just hoped Adrian keep all of his limbs. She liked the guy, yet she used him as a tool.

Sam and Dean were waiting for them in the ‘living room/library’ place, as Claire called it, looking at Sam’s laptop. Probably a case. She needed a case. But, now she had different worries. She tried to introduce Adrian as nonchalant as she could, but she fucked even that up, because Adrian took her hand and smiled sweetly, introducing himself.

Sam smiled cautiously, probably trying to decipher him. Adrian just kept on grinnin’ like an idiot. Dean shook his hand, eyes landing on their intertwined hands for just a second. But she noticed it. She pulled her hand out of Adrian’s, not having a reason why. Dean had a grip on her and it always dominated. She couldn’t deny that, and by the sly smirk on his face, he knew it.

She’d already told them that Adrian knew about the monster killing business, so there weren’t any awkward silences. Just awkward conversations. The guys weren’t such into small talk. They interrogated him about what he knew exactly, how’d they met, and why wasn’t he running his scared ass off away from Claire. The last question was by Dean. Adrian didn’t go into their so called ‘relationship’, but also answered every singe one of their questions. They didn’t seem to like him very much, but she was okay with that. He wasn’t sticking around anyway.

“So, we’ll go to my room for a while. Haven’t seen this guy in a while, we have a lot of catching up to do,” she actually meant that. But that was so not the only thing they’ll do.

Adrian smirked, reading her expression, and got up, following her to her room. He tried asking her why she looked so tense back there, but she just closed the door and practically jumped on the guy. She felt a sharp pain on her back, but she didn’t let it stop her. She needed to forget about certain people for a while, and he was the perfect solution. He was confused at first, but got on the board not long after. Things escalated pretty quick after that. But she didn’t forget. She was just glad she didn’t screamed the wrong name, even though it was in her head the whole time. She was so screwed.  
.  
.  
.  
“At least she could’ve waited until we got to bed,” Dean said.

Sam laughed, somewhat agreeing with him. But he knew that no one could tell Claire what to do. “At least we don’t hear them here.”

Dean silently agreed. He looked kinda annoyed, but Sam couldn’t figure out why. That Adrian guy wasn’t that bad.

“That guy was awful,” Dean stated, making Sam chuckle at the was his brother was overreacting.

He tried to change the subject to something more cheerful, “Hey. Forgot to tell you. Eileen is coming to Kansas for a hunt, and she’ll stay with us for a while.”

Dean lightened up at that. He loved Eileen. And that was rare, because Sam couldn’t think the last time he liked a girl that he wasn’t trying to seep with. Charlie came to his mind immediately, but he instantly got her out of his head, not being able to deal with the guilt. He may never could.

But the point was, that Eileen was one in a million and Sam was one lucky son of a bitch.

“Lucky bastard,” Dean said, reading his mind.

“You would be too, if you just decided that you were ready. To look, for starters.”

“You think I’m not ready?” he asked incredulously, ready to argue. Sam knew him. “Tell me this, Sammy. How many female hunters remotely our age have you seen wondering around?”

“Oh really, now you care about age? A year ago, you were ready to bang your way through college we were working a case on,” Sam wasn’t grossed out or thought it was inappropriate, because it was Dean. Nothing could surprise him when it comes to Dean.

“Exactly. All they wanted to do was fuck. And all I used to wanted is to fuck. That doesn’t qualify as a relationship,” Dean cheered a bit at the thought of sex. Man-child.

“Used to. Wow,” Sam smirked, “maybe you are ready for a relationship.”

“Don’t look so shocked. I’m forty years old for fuck’s sake,” he commented.

“Then let’s find you a girl,” Sam smiled, honestly happy for the way the conversation was heading.

Dean snorted, “Don’t bother. Claire is already on it.”

Sam raised his eyebrows, as if asking _what the actual fuck_. Dean told Claire that he wanted to settle? Claire?

“Yeah, she got in her head that I don’t deserve to be alone, blah, blah, blah..,” he took a sip of his bear before continuing. “She thinks that I intentionally won’t find someone I want to settle with, so she decided to take on an impossible task. Find me a ‘soulmate’.”

“That girl is full of surprises,” Sam was impressed.

But he was still worried about her. Since they crossed paths, all they did was cause her pain. He was worried, and he wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice. He wasn’t going to take her help for granted, like he did with Charlie.

“She sure is,” Dean sighed, tuning out.

Sam was worried about him, too. He seemed absent for the last few days. Since they ran into Claire.Was he not okay with her being there? But they came to a decision together. Dean didn’t complain. At least not out loud.

“ Hey, man,” Sam broke the silence. “What’s goin’ on with you and Claire?”

He could see Dean tense and stand straighter in his chair. He cleared his throat. ”Claire? Me?” he started laughing and talking rapidly, “Why do you think there is something going on? There’s nothing goin’ on.”

Sam smiled apologetically, “Okay, fine. Sorry.”

Dean took a sip of his beer and didn’t stop ‘till he finished it. Sam knew him. Something was off.

“I just-” he continued, “I mean, you both seem tense. Are you fighting? What’s the issue?”

Dean let out a breath, “Oh. That. Nothin’ is happening. We had a little argument, nothin’ to worry about.”

Sam couldn’t tell if he was lying or not. Dean was pretty passionate about all sorts of stuff. It wouldn’t be a surprise if he and Claire got into fights, because Claire seemed to the same as his brother. Hasty and ardent.

“Okay, I just wanted to know. ‘Was worried.”

Dean put his hand on Sam’s shoulder reassuringly, “As I said, nothing to worry ‘bout, Sammy. I got it under control.”

Sam nodded, trusting him. Yet, he couldn’t shake the feeling that the tension in the air was gonna burst and somebody was going to get hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. Did I actually post??  
> But for real, I'm sorry guys. I barely have inspo anymore. I'll try to post as frequently as i can. :)


	11. Chapter 11

A weed had passed. Adrian hasn’t stayed longer than two days. They went on a hunt the third. Dean and Claire were on speaking terms. No joking, no flirting, no provoking, just civilized talk. She helped him kill as wendigo, because he wouldn’t let her do it herself. She didn’t know the reason why. The returned home bloody the fifth day, and went to their separate rooms. Adrian called, and Claire ignored. Dean brought home a girl the next night. It sounded like they broke the bed. She started jogging. To clear her head, and keep her in a fighting shape. She tried not to feel. At least Sam was happy. He was ecstatic about Eileen coming. She was happy for him,and really excited to meet her. They spent the last day of the week waiting for her and looking for cases. She tried not to make eye contact. He kept on looking.

Eileen was the coolest person Claire had ever met. She was tough, sweet, funny and really smart. She reminded her of Jody. She missed her. Dean volunteered to cook, so that Sam and Eileen could catch up. They happily agreed to that. _Great_. Just the two of them in the kitchen. She needed to find an excuse to leave, without being too obvious. The thing was, she felt bad about making him cook a four person dinner all by himself. And what if he fucked up? Yeah, she needed to help him.

“So what do you need chopin’?” She asked standing in front of the counter and picking up the biggest knife she saw.

Dean looked surprised, not expecting her to offer to help. He smiled then, taking the knife out of her hand, “Put the pasta into boiling water.”

She nodded, and started helping. They fell into a routine not long after.

It was perfect. He instructed her what to do after every step, always somehow a breath away. And the kitchen wasn’t even that small. She didn’t complain, even though she should have. She was too captivated by him. Not just his body, but everything about him was so fragile and alluring, that she somehow felt almost physical pain watching him, not being able to express how she felt. She shouldn’t have these feelings. Because it won’t end well, and she was gonna be the one bleeding.

At least she had too much pride to start anything with him again, so maybe there was nothing to worry about after all.

After few hours, they made some ‘weird-ass-name’ pasta, garlic bread, ton of salad and tomato soup. Claire, of course, tried everything, not being able to control herself (that happened a lot those days). She made Dean try a piece of everything too, which didn’t require a lot of convincing.

She dipped her finger into tomato soup, trying if it was salty enough. And it was amazing. Like, really amazing. She didn’t have an idea that Dean could cook. She looked up to praise him, only to find him watching her intently, so close to licking his lips. She was confused for a second, when she realized that the lusty look was meant for her. She wasn’t even doing anything hot. She never understood guys.

“You don’t get to look at me like that,” she said.

“Not looking at you,” he calmly replied. Then he licked his lips.  _Awesome. Just what she needed._

“Not gonna happen buddy,” she smirked. “At least not again.”

He stepped closer. She didn’t need that. Not him. Not when he just wanted to play with her. But he was so tall. And so _Dean_.

“Don’t know what you’re talking ‘bout,” he still didn’t change his expression. Like what was she saying didn’t bother him. Like he didn’t care.

She kept backing up. _Not again_.

“Please,” she breathed. “Don’t do this again.”

He consumed her space, and after what it seemed like ages, finally spoke, “I won't do anything, unless you ask me to.”

Claire closed her eyes, not believing what was happening, Not knowing what the hell to do. He kept playing with her and she kept letting him. After all, there wasn't anything she could do.

“Please,” she heard herself whisper, but didn’t know what was asking for. Dean was just there and that thing they had, it was slowly absorbing her.

He got the message, closing in on her. Claire knew it shouldn’t have felt like that. Like only he mattered. She could feel his lips ghosting over hers and forgot every single thing that was on her mind. They were breathing the same air once again, and oh, how she had missed it. His lips were warm. So incredibly warm. Not hot, like the last time, but just enough that her whole body was on fire. He was kissing her softly, calmly. It was perfect. If they didn’t kiss again, she would be satisfied with that one. And she could live with that. Soon, their tongues were in perfect harmony, same as their lips, hands, hips. It was like they were made to do that. To coexist in perfect sync. She was soon on the counter, legs wrapped around Dean, holding him in place. They weren’t trying anything more. She was scared he would push her away again. She could feel that he wanted more, but the guy had so much self control, it was insane. He put his hands on each sides of her, not touching her with anything but his lips. Well, she could feel his hard on, but that didn’t count. Claire grabbed his hair, hauling him closer. They kept changing the pace, but always coming back to that sweet rhythm that left her breathless. In the back of her head, she could hear a noise. Steps, maybe.

She tried to return to reality, but it was hard, considering that Dean Winchester was basically on top of her.

“Dean,” she tried speaking, while his lips were still on hers. She started laughing, not believing in what situation she got herself into.

“No,” he continued kissing her, “No, no, no. Lets not stop.”

She was smiling, still trying to kiss him at the same time. It was much more difficult than it looked in the movies, “I think they're coming.”

He groaned in her mouth, fulfilling every single of her dirty fantasies. She bit his lip, not being able to control herself, once again. He seemed to have liked it, because he was on top of her in a second. But Sam and Eileen were coming and she couldn’t risk it. Dean would absolutely hate her if people found out. They would blame him for corrupting a little girl, and  he would start hating himself and eventually her. She was not stupid. She knew the consequences. She just tried to ignore them.

Claire hopped off the counter, breaking the kiss. Dean seemed dazed, and she felt lightheaded just looking at his swollen lips. And she made them that way. She understood why women couldn’t get over him. That man was like a fucking drug. And although they were basically in each other faces, and they just stopped kissing, she missed those damn lips.

A s their voices became louder, Dean stepped away from her, and she felt suddenly deserted.

“That asshole didn’t know what was waiting for him,” she heard Eileen as they were entering the kitchen.

Sam laughed. They were walking by each other, hugging and smiling. She knew it sounded awful, but she was jealous. What were the odds that people who were destined to be together actually find each other? Slim to none. They hit the jackpot. And there she was, standing flushed in the kitchen, under someone else's control, and not having the guts to do anything about it.

“Claire, you okay?” Sam asked. “You look red.”

She instantly put her hands on cheeks, feeling herself burning up, “The oven,” she smiled awkwardly. “It’s a bitch.”

Dean didn’t say anything. He just stood there, leaning on the counter, looking at the floor.

Eileen started walking around the kitchen, “This looks so good.”

Dean gave her a tiny smile, not really taking the compliment. He started setting the table, probably to avoid talking, and Eileen jumped to help him. He protested for a while, but gave up not long after, because she was hard to beat in an argument.

“What’s wrong?” Sam stood next to Claire, watching the other two set the table.

“Nothin’. Why’d you ask?”

He looked at her warily, “I wasn’t born yesterday, Claire. I can see something is off. You two had another fight, didn’t you?”

 _Has Dean told him something?_  Sam and Dean were really close. But even with that, she assumed that Sam was in the dark. Dean valued his opinion too much to tell him about Claire. He wouldn’t risk it.

“Yup,” she lied, “He didn’t like me bossing him around.”

Sam still looked dubious. He probably didn’t believe her, but it was a good thing he didn’t wanna push it.

Dinner was extremely awkward. Dean kept ignoring her, so she decided she wasn’t going to torture herself by looking at him. Sam didn’t look too happy, but kept the conversation light. Eileen was cheerful, full of stories of her most badass hunts, making them captivated by her. Sam looked extremely proud, and even Dean asked questions about the hunts from time to time.

Claire tried to pretend that it was just another awkward dinner at Jody’s. Just another normal day. But it wasn’t. She suddenly missed her mother. Maybe Claire could tell her about Dean. Maybe her mom could help her, guide and teach her. Because Claire didn’t know anything about love. Her life was based around revenge, death and hunting. She grew up bitter and bitter people didn’t have time for love. She also missed her father. She started forgetting him. Small things. His hand gestures, the way he talked, his prayers. She kept seeing his face on an angel constantly, but her father was gone, and she hasn’t to terms with that yet. She wasn’t going to see him ever again. It was too much for her. And, if he saw her now, he would be more disappointed than happy to see her. Everybody would be. She hadn’t felt happy in a long time, and it was slowly exhausting her. The Dean drama was just making everything worse.

She excused herself, and went to bed. She knew it would have to get much worse to get better, so she just gave up for a while. She would get her strength in the morning. Now, she was going to sleep.  
.  
.  
.

It was like someone had woken him up from a really, really good dream. He could hear Claire talk about someone coming, but was in too much of a (haze) to actually register it. It was strange being with someone he actually cared about. Exhilarating, even if it was wrong. _But nobody had to know, right?_ He wasn’t thinking long-term, though. He wasn’t thinking about her, or what would the consequences be for her if he kept up with leading her on. But she was so damn warm, so electrifying and not familiar at all. And those things looked so appealing to him.

He was lying to himself, too. Thinking it was just some stupid attraction. Thinking it would just go away. Though he was never going to say that out loud. Something new was going on, and it felt so fucking good. He knew he shouldn’t chase her, knew it was not okay, but he wasn’t thinking with his head when he saw her lips wrapped around her finger, basically fucking moaning. He had no self control.

Well, that was not completely true, because even though he was painfully hard, he didn’t try anything more. How could he? If just wanting her felt that wrong, he didn’t wanna think what would happen if they fucked. He wasn’t going to use her. She was Claire. Jimmy’s daughter, little Claire. Except she wasn’t that little anymore.

He fought the urge to feel her up, to relieve the pressure, like any sane man would. But he cared too much about her, too much just to use her like every other woman in his life. But she was just a girl, and she felt so damn good against his lips.

She was going to see that fucking doctor in a week and it was fucking with his brain. Maybe she wouldn’t even go out with him. Maybe she’d stay there, close to him.

He barely let her go when he heard the steps. He was half hard in his jeans and it was agonizing to make it go away as Eileen and Sam came into the kitchen. He was standing behind the counter, so he got some time before they start setting the table. It was not easy, half listening the conversation, half stealing glances at Claire, searching her face for just a fraction of what she was feeling.

He hated himself in that moment. For not thinking about her, for playing with her emotions. For leading her on. She deserved better. Not someone who had no idea what he was doing,and acting like a jerk to a girl half his age.

But he just couldn’t stay away.

“Gonna turn in. Good night guys,” he heard he speak.

He tried to catch her eye, to tell her he was scared shitless, too, that he was an idiot and that she deserved better. But she didn’t look at him. Not a glance.

He closed his eyes, rubbing his temples, trying to make the incoming headache go away.

“Got it under control, huh?” Sam looked at him, not really mocking, but it still didn’t felt right.

He finished his beer, and went to bed himself. He wished he had a broken bone or had a face full of bruises more that feel the way he was feeling at that moment.

 

They didn’t talk the next day. He waited for a confrontation, for a fight, but she just stayed in her room. Day after that, still nothing. Like he was a ghost. The four of them had a dinner, before Eileen left. Dean could see the pain in Sam’s eyes as he watched her leave. He wanted to follow her. And Dean wouldn’t mind. It was time Sam stopped putting him in front of everyone else. Eileen was his one chance of having a semi-normal life. But Sam was a loyal son of a bitch.

The third day she said good morning, barely glancing in his direction. She looked exhausted.

  
Things changed the next morning. They found a case. And Dean could feel in his bones that it wasn't going to be pretty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Already writing the next one, so I hope it won't take long.


	12. Chapter 12

“So, get this,” Sam started, the three of them crowded around a tiny laptop. “A man killed his wife last week, and just two days ago, a guy was stabbed to death by his girlfriend.”

“Wow,” Claire was excited, as morbid as it sounded, “Well that’s not really specific. Ghost possession? Shapeshifter?”

“Let’s not jump to conclusions just yet,” Dean said.

Sam stood up, taking his laptop with him. They weren’t wasting time. “Heading out in ten.”

She didn’t know how long it would take her to get used to their pace. But she didn’t mind. It was a great distraction.

She was having more of her not so happy thoughts. Trying to think that she wasn’t worthless. That she wasn’t the reason that she was alone. She knew she wasn’t good enough, and just tried to forget about it, to get it out of her mind. It worked most of the days. Yet, all it took was just a little trigger and everything came flooding back. So, she was gonna save the day. She was gonna kill the bad guy and lock it up, like she always does.

She changed into hunting gear, put on her boots and loaded herself with guns. And of course her knife. She never went anywhere without it. He wound was healing nicely, so she didn’t need the bandage like on the last hunt. It made things so much more practical.

She heard someone pacing in front of her room. Not knocking, though. When it became irritating, she opened it, finding Dean, covered in flannel, gazing at her, like she was made of glass.

“You ready?” he asked.

Claire didn’t know what was his angle. She avoided him after the kiss, not having the strength to deal with him. And possibly not even caring that much. She didn’t need another trigger in her life. And he was just that - a trigger. She didn’t need a fucking shrink to know that.

She just nodded, walking past him. Not caring that his lips looked so red, that the pink flannel shirt looked heavenly on him, or that what she was thinking wasn’t anywhere near heavenly.

He grabbed her wrist, making her turn around reluctantly, not meeting his eyes.

“Just because we.. That doesn’t mean.. That doesn’t mean I don’t care. Doesn’t mean I don’t worry. I worry, kid. I noticed,” he smiled sadly, “If I’m right and you are feeling what I think you’re feeling, come to me. I’m kind of an expert at these things.”

I was supposed to be compassionate, nice, but she got mad. Actually mad. Because, who was he trying to be at that moment? Worried friend? The guy she occasionally made out with? Or a man who can shut her out of his life for a week if she did something he didn’t like?

“You deal with your issues first. Don’t ‘worry’ about me. Don’t ‘notice’ stuff about me. You don’t have the right to.”

Dean looked like she punched him in the gut. Like she actually hurt him. She didn’t believe it a second.

“I’ve been around long enough to know that it’s hard. Going through of this alone. I had Sam. And I just want you to know that you have me.”

“Do I?” She wasn’t trying to be mean. Just didn’t want to filter the truth.

Sam called them, ending their conversation. As if Dean would know what to say to her. As if he would know how to comfort her. And she didn’t even know why she needed the comfort. He kept implying it was depression, and that he has been through it, too. But she doesn’t look at it the same way. For her, it was a constant. A demon in the back of her head, whispering. There were times that he would get sick of her, and start yelling. Those were the times that passed slowly, agonizingly. And the only thing that kept her going was a thought that she was a fighter. That she was stronger that her demon. He didn’t have full control over her. And she certainly didn’t need Dean Winchester helping her slay him.

They packed their stuff in the Impala and headed to Wichita. She called Jody to kill the time, and keep her updated. That woman didn’t like being in the dark.

She told her that her back is almost fully healed, and that everything is great. Claire put her on a speaker, because apparently, her word wasn’t assurance enough.

“Doin’ fine, Jody,” Dean said. “How’re things there?”

“Don’t change the subject, Dean. I just hope you didn’t brought you ‘dates’ home, when there is a young girl across the hall from you. She doesn’t need that kind of an influence,” she could practically see her ‘mom’ look, ready to whip some asses.

“Sorry to tell you this, but your young girl has had her fair share of ‘dates’,” he said it in the most dirty way possible.  _Douche._

“Dean!” She yelled from the backseat, wanting to punch him.

“Claire? I didn’t let you go with them to have a better sex life!” Jody started yelling, and she was completely mortified.

“It was Adrian, okay? It wasn’t some random dude from the bar, like Dean brings them. Well, not a dude. He doesn’t bring.. You know what I mean!”

“Honey,” she could her her sigh over the phone, “you keep messing with boys that are just trouble.”

She caught Dean’s eye in the rear view mirror. He was basically smirking. It was childish and stupid, but it made her smile, too.

Jody continued, “Why can’t you find a nice guy for a change, a normal one?”

“Maybe because I’m not a normal girl? Or do you want me to break out to a Taylor Swift song?”

Sam and Dean started laughing like kids, making Jody even angrier. Claire didn’t know what what that funny, but she still enjoyed it. The guys needed to laugh more.

“Oh, you would hate Dean as a teenager, then,” Sam said.

Before she could ask why, Sam got a call from the Wichita PD. He gave them their info earlier that day and asked them to call if anything like the previous accidents happened again.

They stopped laughing, and ended their call with Jody as Sam talked to the police.

After what it seemed like an eternity, he hung up, “Another lover’s quarrel. A girl, Anna, killed her girlfriend. They haven't interrogated her yet. But I assume her answer will be like the others. ‘Someone told them to.’”

“Have you dealt with something like this before?” she asked.

“Yeah. ‘Was a siren. Lots of bruises later,” Dean smiled apologetically at Sam. “But a witch can do this, too.”

“True. And we know witches better than we know sirens. There aren’t many of them in the States. Thank god for that.”

They checked into a motel a few hours later.

“Two rooms. One with two queens, and one regular,” Sam told the receptionist.

“King,” she coughed. She deserved some high quality rest.

Sam smiled, “Sorry. King.”

They went to change, deciding to meet in ten.

She bought herself a suit a week ago and still haven’t worn it. She didn’t like skirts. Dresses were okay. For partying. But skirts were too restricted. The job was unpredictable, so she got herself a pantsuit, which fit her like a glow. And with the recent workout sessions, it was a tiny bit tighter. Which was exactly what she needed. She was always a little curvy, and with the structure she now had, she didn’t feel embarrassed thinking she was hot. And mature.

She put on a white blouse under the blazer, comfiest high heels (in which she practiced running all the time) and headed out to meet the guys.

She didn’t needed to be introduced as a ‘bring daughter to work’, but a trainee. And they didn’t even blink. She knew she looked experienced because that wasn’t a lie. She actually was. She spent more than a year hunting alone, without anyone’s help, and she was sure of her skills. That was her territory.

She wasn’t let in the interrogation room, tho. Confidential, or some shit. Like they weren’t going to tell her as soon as they got out.

And they did. The girl said that a woman, Lexa, told her to kill her girlfriend so they could be together. And she was nowhere to be seen.

“At least the sex was great,” she told them, which made the situation a whole lot easier. For them.

Only sirens had sex with humans, so they could get oxytocin into their system. 'The love hormone'. Which made them kill whoever she wanted to. Usually, the loved ones. It was sick. And the thing was, they couldn’t even see it’s real face. The siren transformed into the person the human wanted the most.

Yeah, she did her homework. Dean once told her that research was as important as the actual hunt. Bet he didn’t think Claire would take it seriously. She was a kid then, after all. He also took her bowling, gave her a gun and made it into one of the best birthdays she ever had. Until, of course, the rest of the shit happened. Little did he know that Claire would be living and hunting with them a few years later.

They did some quick research and realize that the only connection they had was that they all went to the same couple counselor. The siren probably prayed on the weaker couples.

“I’m gonna check the crime scene. Maybe talk to their friends, neighbors, see if they heard or saw anything suspicious,” Sam said.

“Right. Imma go to his counselor, then,” he started the car, without even a glance at her direction.

“And what about me?” She asked.

“You’re gonna stay at the motel and do some more research. We only dealt with this thing once,” he said. “And you’ve been an FBI agent for a day. Wasn’t that enough for ya?”

She didn’t believe the words coming out of that idiot, “I’m not gonna stay at the fucking hotel and do nothing. I’m going with you. ‘Cause if she really is the siren, then you’re gonna need a cover story. And going alone to  _couple_ counseling isn’t that bright of an idea,” she looked at Sam, “Help me out?”

“She actually has a valid point, Dean.” 

Dean looked like his brother betrayed him. It was hilarious to watch, because the guy was acting like a fucking teenager. He gave in not long after.

They dropped Sam off at the vic’s house and headed to the counselor. Claire scheduled a ‘emergency appointment because I think we’re going to break up’ and the woman, Margaret, was free, probably because all of her clients were in prison.

The building in which she worked, was contained of spa, gym and a therapy floor. Margaret and her colleague, Liz, owned the whole building.

They walked past the gym on their way to the counselor, from which Dean couldn't keep his eyes from. The problem was, it wasn’t the gym he was watching. There were a lot of gorgeous women in barely any clothes. And if they had any, they were very tight. They were older, which bothered her the most. She didn’t even know she had that amount of jealousy in her.

She tried to ignore the stares those women gave to Dean, and just took his hand in hers, pulling him away from there. He didn’t protest. In fact, he gripped her tighter.

They walked with their hand intertwined through the whole building, not caring about the stares they got. She was in a suit, which made her look a tiny bit older. But she knew that wasn’t the reason they stared. It was Dean. He was probably the most handsome, or better say, drop dead gorgeous man they have ever seen. Or will ever see. He was gorgeous in a normal day. In his ‘dead guy robe’, in a regular shirt or even in a hunt. But there, all suited up, with his muscles, his height and they way he walked just made him irresistible.

She knew that was the kind of thoughts that would get her in trouble. She needed to sort out her own issues before crawling back to him.

She let his hand, then. As good as it felt pretending he was hers, it was not worth it. The sudden loss of contact made her loose the smug smile.

They made it to the second floor, where the receptionist told them that Margaret was ready to see them. They didn’t have the time to change, so they decided that was going to be their cover. Just two business partners in a office romance gone wrong.

“Please, sit,” the woman had a soothing voice , which was probably good for the job. But Claire had seen gentler killers.

The room was beige. Very neutral. It had a few shelves, a big sofa for them to sit, and a chair in front of them. The only decoration were pictures. Really creepy pictures of people burning, in what it seemed, hellfire.

Dean got really dark in a second, and she could tell he was reliving some of his worst memories. She took his hand in hers again. Not because of jealousy, or appearance, but to calm him down. Provide comfort. She was maybe a bitch some times, but that didn’t mean that she didn’t care.

 _Which was exactly what he told her that morning_ , she thought.

She reassuringly squeezed his hand and was rewarded with a tiniest of smiles. If was good enough for her.

Margaret started with the questing immediately after the introductions, “So, tell me about your issues. What can I help you with?”

“Well, as you can see, we both work for the same company. Which also made us temporary partners. Which is kinda hard, right? And we started dating, but he doesn’t know what he wants,” she was rambling and she knew it. But it was a great cover story. Annoying girlfriend and a boyfriend who has no idea how to be in a relationship.

“It’s true that office relationships are hard. I’m glad you came,” she smiled. “Mr. Smith, how do you feel about the things your partner just said?”

Dean cleared his throat, obviously uncomfortable, “Well.. I agree.”

Claire snorted, but contained the laughter.

“Could you elaborate?” Margaret asked. She was a very patient woman. She’d probably dealt with a bunch of Deans in her time.

“Uhm.. Well.. Maybe if she was a little bit clearer about her feelings and stopped shutting me out, maybe then we could make some progress,” he looked more confident. “It’s not only my fault.”

Claire stared at him, disbelieving. She removed her hand and just stared at the guy. He would never have told her that. And probably let her believe that he didn’t care.

“Claire. Can i call you Claire?” She nodded. “I can tell that this is new for you. He probably doesn’t talk that much about his feelings, am I right? But the thing is, according to him, neither do you.”

Both of them just sat and kept looking at the woman, not saying a word.

Margaret continued, “Communication is the key to a healthy relationship.”

Claire could see that Dean was not in the conversation anymore. His eyes were searching every inch of the room, looking for anything suspicious.

So she continued, to make them look normal, “It’s not our strong suit. Plus, the age difference.” She rolled her eyes dramatically.

“It’s that what’s holding you back? The age?”

That made Dean look at Margaret. Claire too. They didn’t tell their real age, of course, but she could see it with her own eyes that it was not a small difference.

Margaret just smiled, like she knew some secret they didn’t, “Don’t worry, I’ve seen couples with larger age gaps than you. In those cases, it wasn’t healthy. But you two, you have the same job, you think basically the same and I see nothing unhealthy about it. So, what’s the problem?”

Dean looked hesitant. He wasn’t the type to pour his heart out to a complete stranger. She knew it was up to her to make the first move. It wasn’t just about the hunt anymore.

“The problem is, that he knew me since I was a kid. He knows I didn’t have an apple pie life and he feels guilty. I know him,” she spoke, not daring to turn to look at Dean.

Margaret looked at him, “Is that true?”

“Listen. It would be different if she was a stranger. But her father was a good man, and he would kill me if he could see me now. If I was in his place, I certainly would. I’m also friends with her so called step father, and he wouldn’t be pleased, like at all. And trust me, you don’t want to get on his bad side.”

Claire knew that was part of the problem. She knew he was scared to tell his brother. Let alone Cas or Jody.

She wasn’t though. She knew the consequences. But just wouldn’t let them control her.

 _What if they_ didn't _tell them?_  Why wouldn’t they just keep it to themselves? Would that be so bad?

But she couldn’t tell him that, because she knew it wasn’t their only problem. She wasn’t even sure if Dean wanted anything remotely to a relationship with her.

“I see,” Margaret said, breaking her out of her thoughts. “Well, this isn’t gonna solve itself out, and I won’t be able to help you in just one session. What do you think about coming once a week from now, and see how it goes from there?”

She looked at Dean, wondering if any shrink could help them. Either they learn to live with it, or deal with it themselves.

Dean clearly just wanted to get out of there, so she didn’t press it. To him, the problem probably didn’t even exist because there was no relationship.

She noticed a woman getting out of the office down the hall from them as they were saying their goodbyes to Margaret. She was kind of pretty thirty something year old brunette, nothing special about her whatsoever. Except that Dean was staring at her like an idiot. The woman looked up and smiled at him. She reminded Claire of someone.

She basically dragged Dean out of the office and down the stairs. _What the hell?_ He was fucking drooling. And right in front of her.

“Screw you,” she hissed, walking ahead of him.

And that was the exact reason why she didn’t want to play that game with him. Because he always fucking wins. And she ends up locked in her room for days, dealing with that motherfucking demon.

He didn’t say anything, just walked to the Impala slowly, hazily, and gripped the steering wheel. _He was the one who was mad?_ Wow.

They drove in silence, not daring to speak, knowing they would just hurt each other. Like they always do. _Was it even worth it?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a little longer, just to say thank you for sticking with me even though I am a lazy ass person who posts once a month. :)

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Dean/Claire fanfic. Hope you like it fam :) Comment if you have any thoughts on improving. Ly


End file.
